Today I realized I Had Stopped Holding My Breath …..

As I walked our puppy, Doc, around the block today, I realized that I could feel myself breathing again.  Not the kind of breaths you give when your physician says to “give me a few good breaths” nor that kind which you feel when you lay your hand on the chest of your child to see if he/she is still alive, but rather, that kind of breath when you know you are present in the moment God calls you to be…..

I do not remember when I started holding my breath….I did not do it consciously

I did not realize the holding, until that moment I could feel it’s release…

But, today, as I took that stroll, I could feel it

Chest rising and falling…..

Keeping pace with ……

Nothing

Right in the moment God would have me to be

It was not me who realized I had been holding my breath and had now found its release, but rather, a new friend of mine….

He whispered in the quiet of my sanctuary, “I want what you have”

“And, what is it you think I have?” I asked

“Peace.”

I confess, his words caught me off guard, but in considering our conversation later, I realized the truth of his words..

I have found peace

“not as the world giveth” because honestly, there is very little peace to be found in this world

But, I have found that peace “which passes all understanding”

Which comes from our ultimate peace-giver

And, that is what I asked him….

“Are you a man of faith?” just for clarification, because he had shared earlier that he was…

“That is where my peace comes from….faith…in Him”

And, today, as Doc and I walked and talked that silly talk you do with your new puppy, I realized that I am in that sweet spot of life where your recent trials are momentarily behind you and your future lies awaiting God’s leading….

In counseling, we call that “mindfulness” or “being present in the moment” 

Where you are who you are, where you are, when you are…..

And, that is a very healthy place to be

The difference for me is that I know in this thing we call life, peace will ebb and flow if we define it by our moods, or emotions, or thoughts

But, I think what my new friend found in me is that realization is that my peace does not come from this world, but rather, from the one who made this world

God

Jesus

The Holy Spirit

And, somehow, that came across in my spirit in a way my friend could see….

I have had the privilege of “having my mettle tested” much in this life.  Some of it brought on by my own human sinfulness, some of it brought on by sheer chance or misfortune, all under the providence, supervision, and at times, by the direct hand of God

But, none of it wasted…..

For I realize that every single moment of our life, just like the hairs on our head, are accounted for…with the same tender, extravagant love from a heavenly Father who wants us to find our personal peace

 

In Him

So that when good times nod their head in our direction, we give Him praise

And, when trials come and bring us to our knees, we shout His name in thanksgiving

And, especially when we are sailing on the seas of calm and peace, as I am today, that we don’t forget to feel His presence

To call on His name

To spend this time with grateful heart

Knowing that peace is not a place we should aspire to ascertain

But, rather, a choice of soul and spirit

Where we chose to place our heart

Into the Hands

Of the very one who gave us breath….

And, in that, our job is to let go.

Blessings,

Lesa

Giving Our 2016 to God

I love the start of the movie, The Notebook when the narrator says,

“I am nothing special; just a common “wo-man” with common thoughts, and I’ve led a common life…But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who’s ever lived: I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.”

I used to think that was Ian….my children, my parents…my friends

But, I know that in actuality, that means God

I love God.

And, He is, always has been, and always will be enough

As I head into 2016 with my family, for the first time in my life (that I can remember), I am NOT setting any New Year’s Resolutions.  I am not making any promises to myself or to anyone else.  I am not setting high and lofty goals

I am not

And, here is why…..

Rather than do all the above….I am choosing to do only one thing

To love God

Because what the past few years has taught me is that when I love God, make Him first in my life, make Him my priority, all else in my life happens according to His plans, His will, and for my greater good.

I say this as a woman who, oft times, has taken it upon her business-like, organized self to take control, to make lists, to make promises….to make…to make…to make….

And you know what I learned?

That all of my planning, making, taking, organizing, scheduling, etc. mattered not on whit if I didn’t have God in my center, as my first love, as my One and Only.

He is my one and only

He was my one and only before I even came to be

He was my one and only during my good times and my bad

He was my one and only when I was being Godly and when I was not

He was my one and only when I was lost into this world, and he was my one and only when He left all you other sheep and came to find me and bring me back into the fold

So, as I hit the midnight plus one second mark of 2016, I want to end the old year and start the new year by sharing that I have learned without Him….I am nothing, I have nothing, I know nothing, I can give nothing….

But, with Him……I am everything, I have everything, I know everything important (He loves me), and I can give all of myself to others

That is my prayerful hope and desire for 2016….

I grow in Him, for Him, and closer to Him

I pray to “be a blessing and be blessed”

Amen, Amen, and Amen!

Blessings,

Lesa

               Love Extravagantly…..The Greatest Gift of All

 

 As I sat in our family room watching the kids open their Christmas presents, I was reminded of Ian’s young-man’s promise to me years ago and then again five years ago this May, to love me, his children, and my children extravagantly.

No, not in that way of lots of money, too many gifts to handle, spoiled-rotten kind of extravagance….although at times, I think he does that, too.  

The type of extravagance he loves us with is that soul-sharing, deep-seated love which means that no matter what, he is going to stand in front of, beside, and behind us.  When we need something, he will work hard to provide.  When we don’t need and just want, he is going to firmly and yet tenderly decline our want because he knows real love gently declines that which draws us to selfishness and away from God.  He does not claim perfection in his life, and in fact, shares his imperfections in truth.  But, what he does do acknowledge that the same heavenly Father who forgives...does this out of his great love for each of us.

And, I think that is what I love most about Ian.

He steps aside so that our children and I see God.

As a daughter of an earthy father (and mother) who did that as well, I fully understand having my earthly father step aside in worldly life so that his children could see…and recognize….and witness true love……

Authentic love

Extravagant love….as in lavish, bountiful, fulsome, and plentiful…..

And, by doing so, he is teaching my children how to do that….how to return love to others.  

When someone loves you unconditionally and you know it…it frees you

It unburdens your heart, your soul, your heart to love others in ways you might not have found possible had you not been so loved yourself.

That is what Ian does for me.  For my children.

He wraps us up in his unfailing love….credits the Father….and encourages that love to be shared with others.

You can see it in our eyes…our smiles…..our way of loving, caring, and sharing with one another….like what I bore witness to last night.

 

Sister….and brother….and brother…..and Jeremy…..and Mom…..and Ladder……laughing, sharing, and caring.

So, on this Christmas Eve, as I am reminded of my many blessings, I share my greatest….

To be loved extravagantly

For my children to be loved extravagantly

And, to witness their taking their cups which are overflowing with love and care and kindness and sharing that with those around them…

It’s a legacy Ian has given me, his, and my children….

And, I am grateful.

Be Blessed,

Lesa

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.  I John 3:1