God Answered My Prayers When He Gave Me.....…My Helen
In 1992, our family decided to do a major down-stroke. Not that we were so high up on the financial
ladder that our move was a major decrease in the eyes of the world, but to our
family it was. We did several things in
our down-stroke….I went very part time at my job decreasing our family income
by almost one-half, we sold our newly built and lovely starter home and moved
into a major fixer-upper. We traded in
our beloved Honda for a used family Van.
We pulled our baby daughter from day care and moved her home to “Mommy
care”. We used my growing retirement fund
to support the income we lost and we initiated the process of attempting to
have baby number 2.
We changed our lives in significant ways. And, when you make dramatic changes like
that, you had best be praying about them….and, we were. And, I was.
I remember praying personally for every little detail of the
process but especially for a change in heart.
And, I asked God to help us move to a neighborhood where our decisions
didn’t seem at all dramatic but rather, were an answer to prayer.
I remember praying that God bring into our lives a friend for
me who would understand the dramatic change we were making and who would
encourage me on the days it would get rough, because I knew enough to
understand that it would.
And, it did.
And, HE did.
When we moved to 1020 Balsam Drive, we had not lived there
long before a burst of energy in the form of a light haired, optimistic, dynamo
of a woman approached our back porch with a big hello and a smile the size of a
sunrise on a Kentucky summer morning.
“Hello, I’m Helen. My
husband is Phil. I have four daughters,
so please be careful not to run over one because we basically share a driveway.”
“Oh, and by the way, do you like to walk, because I really really need to start
walking?”
I laughed. Out loud. She spoke quickly and will a sweeping sense
of humor like that of a mother who had decided that laughing was more important
than doing laundry or mopping the bathroom floor.
I didn’t realize that day I met “my” Helen, that my life was
in for a dramatic change which would follow me….no, which would carry me
through all the rest of the days of my life.
We became more than friends.
We grew into sisters of the most precious kind which was really rather
remarkable because she had a slew of them already and she loved them
dearly.
But, for some reason, she seemed to understand that I needed
her, and, I think, at times, she needed me too.
We shared a real and frank and honest friendship. She knew everything about me, both good and
bad….and, I her. Things I know went to
the grave with her. And, which will go
with me when I join her.
Our friendship began while walking around our neighborhood…we
walked pretty faithfully off and on…and off and on…we spent many late evenings
after our children were in bed, talking about life and husbands and
children. But, most importantly, we
talked about ourselves and about our God.
Weather was not a problem because on rainy days, we sat on my
covered porch and drank hot tea or coffee.
Summer was nice because we sat out at her pool and dipped our toes in
the water. Even in Winter, there were
times we sat for hours in the car until one of our husbands called out to us to
come in for the evening.
We had “seasons” together when we cooked for a month for our
families, planted flowers in our gardens and mostly, we just talked some more….
When you have a friend who will kneel beside you at the edge
of your couch, you are blessed.
When you have a friend who, rather than sugar coat truth to
you, chooses to see the good in you when you are ugly, who sheds tears with you
in your moments of sorrows but who will only allow you to wallow in self-pity
for a few moments before she makes you get up and going in life, you are
blessed.
I wasn’t Helen’s only friend, for she had many. But, I never knew that until she left us and
the church was surrounded with the many she had come to bless over the years…..up
until then, I always thought I was her only and best friend….she just made each
of us feel special like that. And, you
know….it worked. And, as a result, her
friends became my friends because we had something special in common….we had “our”
Helen.
She shared her husband with us….loaning him out to us to help
us renovate our home, keep our appliances running, and helping keep our kids
from drowning in her pool. She shared
her daughters with us, some babysitting mine, some allowing us to fix them up
on dates, and others permitting us to take pictures of her wedding.
She shared her family with us and I confess, I didn’t do so
well remembering which name went with which face. All I really knew for certain was that each
had a special place in her heart.
Honestly, I don’t really know of anyone Helen didn’t
love. She had this innate ability to see
the good in people even when they didn’t look so good on the outside.
Helen taught me about truth, compassion and being set free in
Him. I was permitted to join her in the
freedom that sharing with another who will listen and not judge.
Helen did what a true friend does….
She just loved me
When we moved to Georgetown (a move I didn’t want to make),
it tore my heart in two. In fact, it was
so bad that she didn’t even stay at home the day we moved because we both decided
it would be easier to say our goodbyes in advance…..
While we stayed in touch, that touch waned over the years to become
a phone call a few times a year, or a casual drop in….she and the girls did
come to our home while we were out of town one year. The had a “mother-daughter”
weekend and I can still hear the joy in her voice as she told me about spending
time with her girls….it makes me smile remembering… thinking of the fun they
had in my home….that her presence in lived there long after she had physically
gone back to her own.
Helen was like that, too.
She left a little piece of herself every time you had to part
from one another…her hug could carry you for days and knowing that she would be
praying for you a priceless gift.
We did finally get more "back in touch" but the time was too short....too too short...for by then, we knew her days with us...with me...with you....would not be as long as she would like...as we would like....
But, ever faithful....ever the loving daughter, mother, sister, friend...even then she reminded us all of the purpose of this life was to ready us for the next...and, to take others with us as we go....to prepare and to be prepared. Not to weep with great sorrow, but to celebrate with great joy...
Even now, as I write about her….where sadness could fill my
heart and tears my soul, Helen left instead, joy and laughter and memories to
fill her void. On those days I forget
and go to dial her number of end an appointment in Lexington and consider
dropping by her now Helen-less home, when sorrow could overwhelm me….it does
not.
Because the greatest blessing and lesson Helen taught me was….that
she is right where she is called to be….with the One whom she is called to be
with….
Call me strange, but there have been times this past 365 days
when I would swear I can hear her say my name….”Lesa” in that chipper little
way she had….
And, I smile
And, I know……she would not have us hug our sorrow to us but
rather, would want us to live with blessed peace…would want us to share sweet
joy….would want us to share abundant love….
In her honor
And, in His name….
So, this 19th of January, that is what I will do….
How could I not?
For, I have a friend in Jesus…..who became real to me because
of my friendship with Helen….
Till We Meet Again….
Lesa
In 1992, our family decided to do a major down-stroke. Not that we were so high up on the financial
ladder that our move was a major decrease in the eyes of the world, but to our
family it was. We did several things in
our down-stroke….I went very part time at my job decreasing our family income
by almost one-half, we sold our newly built and lovely starter home and moved
into a major fixer-upper. We traded in
our beloved Honda for a used family Van.
We pulled our baby daughter from day care and moved her home to “Mommy
care”. We used my growing retirement fund
to support the income we lost and we initiated the process of attempting to
have baby number 2.
We changed our lives in significant ways. And, when you make dramatic changes like
that, you had best be praying about them….and, we were. And, I was.
I remember praying personally for every little detail of the
process but especially for a change in heart.
And, I asked God to help us move to a neighborhood where our decisions
didn’t seem at all dramatic but rather, were an answer to prayer.
I remember praying that God bring into our lives a friend for
me who would understand the dramatic change we were making and who would
encourage me on the days it would get rough, because I knew enough to
understand that it would.
And, it did.
And, HE did.
When we moved to 1020 Balsam Drive, we had not lived there
long before a burst of energy in the form of a light haired, optimistic, dynamo
of a woman approached our back porch with a big hello and a smile the size of a
sunrise on a Kentucky summer morning.
“Hello, I’m Helen. My
husband is Phil. I have four daughters,
so please be careful not to run over one because we basically share a driveway.”
“Oh, and by the way, do you like to walk, because I really really need to start
walking?”
I laughed. Out loud. She spoke quickly and will a sweeping sense
of humor like that of a mother who had decided that laughing was more important
than doing laundry or mopping the bathroom floor.
I didn’t realize that day I met “my” Helen, that my life was
in for a dramatic change which would follow me….no, which would carry me
through all the rest of the days of my life.
We became more than friends.
We grew into sisters of the most precious kind which was really rather
remarkable because she had a slew of them already and she loved them
dearly.
But, for some reason, she seemed to understand that I needed
her, and, I think, at times, she needed me too.
We shared a real and frank and honest friendship. She knew everything about me, both good and
bad….and, I her. Things I know went to
the grave with her. And, which will go
with me when I join her.
Our friendship began while walking around our neighborhood…we
walked pretty faithfully off and on…and off and on…we spent many late evenings
after our children were in bed, talking about life and husbands and
children. But, most importantly, we
talked about ourselves and about our God.
Weather was not a problem because on rainy days, we sat on my
covered porch and drank hot tea or coffee.
Summer was nice because we sat out at her pool and dipped our toes in
the water. Even in Winter, there were
times we sat for hours in the car until one of our husbands called out to us to
come in for the evening.
We had “seasons” together when we cooked for a month for our
families, planted flowers in our gardens and mostly, we just talked some more….
When you have a friend who will kneel beside you at the edge
of your couch, you are blessed.
When you have a friend who, rather than sugar coat truth to
you, chooses to see the good in you when you are ugly, who sheds tears with you
in your moments of sorrows but who will only allow you to wallow in self-pity
for a few moments before she makes you get up and going in life, you are
blessed.
I wasn’t Helen’s only friend, for she had many. But, I never knew that until she left us and
the church was surrounded with the many she had come to bless over the years…..up
until then, I always thought I was her only and best friend….she just made each
of us feel special like that. And, you
know….it worked. And, as a result, her
friends became my friends because we had something special in common….we had “our”
Helen.
She shared her husband with us….loaning him out to us to help
us renovate our home, keep our appliances running, and helping keep our kids
from drowning in her pool. She shared
her daughters with us, some babysitting mine, some allowing us to fix them up
on dates, and others permitting us to take pictures of her wedding.
She shared her family with us and I confess, I didn’t do so
well remembering which name went with which face. All I really knew for certain was that each
had a special place in her heart.
Honestly, I don’t really know of anyone Helen didn’t
love. She had this innate ability to see
the good in people even when they didn’t look so good on the outside.
Helen taught me about truth, compassion and being set free in
Him. I was permitted to join her in the
freedom that sharing with another who will listen and not judge.
Helen did what a true friend does….
She just loved me
When we moved to Georgetown (a move I didn’t want to make),
it tore my heart in two. In fact, it was
so bad that she didn’t even stay at home the day we moved because we both decided
it would be easier to say our goodbyes in advance…..
While we stayed in touch, that touch waned over the years to become
a phone call a few times a year, or a casual drop in….she and the girls did
come to our home while we were out of town one year. The had a “mother-daughter”
weekend and I can still hear the joy in her voice as she told me about spending
time with her girls….it makes me smile remembering… thinking of the fun they
had in my home….that her presence lived there long after she had physically
gone back to her own.
Helen was like that, too.
She left a little piece of herself every time you had to part
from one another…her hug could carry you for days and knowing that she would be
praying for you a priceless gift.
Even now, as I write about her….where sadness could fill my
heart and tears my soul, Helen left instead, joy and laughter and memories to
fill her void. On those days I forget
and go to dial her number after an appointment in Lexington and consider
dropping by her now Helen-less home, when sorrow could overwhelm me….it does
not.
Because the greatest blessing and lesson Helen taught me was….that
she is right where she is called to be….with the One whom she is called to be
with….
Call me strange, but there have been times this past 365 days
when I would swear I can hear her say my name….”Lesa” in that chipper little
way she had….
And, I smile
And, I know……she would not have us hug our sorrow to us but
rather, would want us to live with blessed peace…would want us to share sweet
joy….would want us to share abundant love….
In her honor
And, in His name….
So, this 19th of January, that is what I will do….
How could I not?
For, I have a friend in Jesus…..who became real to me because
of my friendship with Helen….
Till We Meet Again….
Lesa
