Home is Where You Go to Watch Your Friend Be a Blessing....

I have a young-Mom friend who fairly consistently shares on face book her child rearing experiences.  She is unique in many ways….she understands already the blessing that a child is to his parents.

She understands fully the phrase, “her cup overfloweth” because God has chosen to bless her with triplets….a sweet God answered prayer to her, her husband’s, her family’s and her church family and friend’s prayers.

I admire this woman.

I admire her very much.

When in her presence, you sense a gratefulness in her heart.  When I look at her from across the church sanctuary, I see her kind eyes look sweetly to her babies with much love….love that comes from understanding the value of the gift she has been given….

I have seen small glances between she and her husband…yes, we are overwhelmed…but, yes, we can do this.

Precious to my heart is when she walks down the aisle to take her babies to Kids’ Own Worship during our church service.  Typically, she has the sweet help of her husband to get them to class, but on this one Sunday, she walked with them alone.

It was precious……to her left was one son, holding fast to her hand…at an angle she walked so that all four of them could fit down the aisle.  Her other hand had two sweet, little palms grasping…one son’s hand to her palm and her daughter’s hand to her pinkie.

THIS is what God meant when he said for the little children to “come unto me”…..

I know I was not the only person touched by this Mary Cassatt scene played out before our sermon even began.  What a beautiful story she is telling about God’s love….

Sweeter still is that even though her own cup overfloweth….she manages to notice the needs of others…praying, fasting and encouraging us to do the same….

When I envision Godly mothers, I see this woman clearly….

What I admire about her is that she does not pretend to “have it all together”…..her messages are about seeking help…from others who have done this already…who have walked this path before her….who understand.

I admire her frankness.  With us, her church family, her face book friends, her family….she knows she cannot do this child-rearing thing alone.

She knows she needs the prayers and encouragement of others…and, she is not afraid to share her needs.

It is a blessing to “watch” her raise her children….it is a blessing to be one of many prayer-warriors for her sweet family…

It is a blessing to have a friend who very clearly realizes that we are not to try to “take on” this earthly journey alone….we are to seek the help, love and support of our friends and family.

She does this very well..

I am blessed by her.

But, more importantly, her husband and children are blessed by her.  And, it is a humble privilege to watch…..

Blessings,

Lesa

Home is Where You Go to Have “Good, Clean Fun”……

Our boys and several of their friends participated in “FROM” this weekend.  FROM, for those of us who didn’t have one when we were in high school, is Freshman Prom.  I confess to some anxiety over FROM…the expense, the dedicated time to shop for tuxes, the flowers, the ballgame right before, the photo session, LIMO or no LIMO?, the post FROM party, the late…or should I say early am hours…I am 49 and don’t function as well at 1 am as I used to.  The ability to get up to make it to church the next…well, the same day.

I think even more worrisome is the “after” stuff which comes after FROM…the parties.  Parties to homes of kids I don’t know, parents I don’t know at locations I am unfamiliar with.  At our house, you go nowhere unless we know the parents, know the location, have confidence the parent is going to be there, have confidence the parent is not only going to be present, but will have control over the situation.  A call and/or visit to the parent’s is made.  And, tonight’s party did not meet with any of those criteria…thus, I got to be the mean mom and say “no”.  Thankfully, I was not alone in that…the other parents of my boys friends felt the same way…so, we were a united front (Thank God for Kim/Mark, Kris/Todd, Jamie, etc.)

I didn’t party when I was in high school.  I didn’t feel the desire to party…didn’t want the possibility of problems which can come with parties, didn’t want to have to ask my parents to go to a party.  So, I have to work hard to “give permission” to my much more social children who are not like their mother.

I believe that it is okay that my children are not like me….it is not bad…their desire to want to go have fun…it is just that having fun has its limits…needs it boundaries….

My parents had a philosophy…”I will trust you as long as you do not give me a reason not to”……..so, that is what I try to do with my children.  I can tell you…much simpler it is to raise them when they were in elementary school and in middle school…..much more difficult it is when they get to the age where self-thought enters their decision making.  It is a humbling time for a parent.  

The confidence you have in the teachings you have given your children as youngsters is stretched as they grow into adulthood….all the teachings you have given them since birth are called upon to get them through this period of life.  No parenting is perfect…and, frankly, my children’s has some flaws which we see evidence of daily, but they have been taught right versus wrong, they do know to put Christ as their center, they do know the right thing to do….it is becoming increasingly vital that they do what they know to do….

We talk about this a lot. 

We talk about my and their Dad’s parenting failures.

We talk about how they will be parented moving forward.

It is a humbling time.

We talk about the need for trust, respect, and faith that if they are told “no” to something that it is because as parents, we can see danger where they are youth, cannot.

We talk about fun versus danger.

We discuss the desire to say “yes” as often as we can…..but, balance it with “no” which is to be respected.

Will they obey perfectly?

No.

Do I obey perfectly?

No.

What I do believe is that I have three children who have great  hearts…who have been through much…but, who are survivors….

I believe that their journey these past 21 years and 16 years is not in vain….some of the lessons  they have learned will be used to serve others…..to make the place around them better…

I believe that they are not “finished” products….and, I am grateful for those adults around them who love them, care for them, believe in them and see the good in them.  I am grateful for the Dads and Moms who reach out to my children, who provide safe havens in which they can play and grow. To their grandparents who love them….just love them….

I am increasingly grateful for those of our friends who “adopt” my children as their own.  Who tow them to events, feed them, discipline them and genuinely Love them.  The Coach Johnny’s and Ms.  Coach Jane, to “second Mom Melissa” and “Mrs. Kim”….to cheerleader Leslie and Mr. Steven.  To Fannie…to Ms. Kris and Mr. Todd.  To neighbor/friend Mrs. Laura.  And, the list could go on and on…..

I am especially touched by those of my friends who see the good in my children….who stand beside them when I cannot….who hold them accountable and who take time to listen to them.

I could not nor would I want to travel this journey with you……and, I am glad we don’t have to…

You assist in teaching my children that live can be fun….that FROMs can be a great experience….that you/we are willing to work together to give our children opportunities for “good, clean fun”….

With your help, we teach our children the need to serve and be authentic….the need to balance living for self with living with other’s needs in mind…that there is more to life than playing and more to fun than being silly.

Last night was such an experience….

No party.

But, lots of fun.

Instead, late night/early am trips to Taco Bell, lots of laughter and conversation around the TV, XBOX and in the family room.

It was a night of “good, clean fun”…….

Blessings,

Lesa