Love is in the Details….
I don’t know who to credit with this quote…I am not even sure when it was that I first heard this quote..
I do remember my sister, Jill, explaining to me that her wedding was “all about the details because “love is in the details” ….and, she truly did have an exceptionally lovely, down to the smallest detail wedding…I was touched by her attention to everything and amazed at her organizational skills. She is still like this with her little family…..her love is evident…
Tough, though, if you are not an overly detailed person, which I am not.
I am a generalist….I see things in BIG picture format. If I get caught with too many details, it bogs me down and I cannot get anything accomplished.
Some of my friends will laugh at the above comment, because they find me very detail-oriented….even today, I keep a monthly calender for both my current family and for my ex-husband to share so that he is kept abreast of our children’s activities. I do this from love because I care that he is able to be just as involved as he wants to be and chooses to be.
I have organized baseball teams as “coach’s wife” and school home rooms as “class mom”. I have written PKU newsletters which went across the entire state of Kentucky
But, it did not come easy to me. I struggled. I felt like Paul….”I do do what I don’t want to do and don’t do what I want to do”……because women seem to be judged on how well they can organize their families, I worked like Martha Steward striving to make homemade foods for my daughter, daily iron my husband’s shirts to starchy perfection, vacuumed the kitchen at midnight, cut my children’s hair to save money, I made sure our clothes in the closet were organized from lights to darks and that our bathroom towels were folded in the exact tri-fold that all good women did.
I rarely said no, and then felt guilty. I often said yes, and then felt exhausted.
It exhausts me to read this.
And, then one day, it all changed…..
I do not fully remember what caused the change….
But, I am grateful.
I remember distinctly asking God….how can I be the “me” you created me to be and yet show love to my family?
And, he answered…..Love Them….as only you can…
Which is such a “God-incident’ thing since I always signed my letters to children and at times even my siblings…ILYAOYMC” OR “ILYAOYBSC”
I love you as only your mama can….I love you as only your big sister can….
And, that was the beginning of change for me.
Yes, I do think love is in the details….I think my sister learned early on what I had not figured out yet….
Love is in the details as YOU are able to love.
For me, it meant giving up organizing things for others and focusing instead on my own family….
It meant seeking out my God-given gifts and using them in a detailed way.
Thus, I went back to writing notes. Many of you may have received a note from me (if not, I apologize. I probably wrote it but failed to get it to the mailbox), I began cooking little meals and delivering them to your door, I sat more in my “mama chair” with my babies and rock and sang to them. I let the laundry, vacuuming and house work go and climbed the Magnolia tree with my boys. I bought a subscription to the Lexington Children’s Theatre and took my daughter on Sundays. We grew a garden together. We laid out on the concrete in our driveway and watched the stars together.
Our motto became “Honey…dream big dreams, because if Jesus lives in your dreams, your dreams will live”….(Thank you Eva Self)
We initiated “family goals”…..and loved to mark them off when we were successful in achieving them. We still do this…it is just a little different now.
We fed the ducks, ate watermelon like pigs and stank like dogs from playing in the mud.
We had fun.
Now, obviously, we didn’t get this perfect or some things in our lives would be very different….
· But, as I tell the children….and, as a dear friend, Nancy
·
o “Isn't it funny how we put some people on a pedestal and think somehow that they are different than the rest of us? I am just a forgiven saint walking the narrow road to heaven and trying to show others the way. We all have lumps and bumps...and stumble from time to time.”
While I don’t think anyone would ever dare put me on a pedestal….and, it saddens me to think that I am not necessarily one I would recommend anyone follow, she got it right..
“I am a forgiven saint….walking the narrow road…trying to be a light where I can…trying to be authentic as I go….never judging…
Just loving…
Loving as God has made me to love…
What a relief….
I can be myself….love the way I am able and that is A-OK with God……
Love IS in the details……
As YOU and I are able to love….
Blessings on your day,
ILYAOIC,
Lesa
