Never Forget....

Never Forget….

Life has a way of teaching, if you but listen.  Some souls learn quickly and simply and some not so much. But, ultimately, at the end of the day or the closure of our life, the lessons were there….it’s in our ability to see them and to learn from them that we are changed and that we grow. 

I am no exception.  I think I was a “middle of the road” learner.  Some things, I soaked up like a sponge and other lessons, I just did not get easily.  Some…I still wait to learn. 

But, there are some lessons which have been seared on my heart which I never want to forget.  They are the top of a long, lengthy list which I have started to add to my “Never Forget” journal. 

I learned about the power of a “Never Forget” journal after hearing the words of Kay Coles James at a Women’s Conference many years ago.  Kay spoke to an audience of Christian women, imparting those lessons she had learned in life in a real and intimate way.  Kay had grown up in the poverty of public housing to eventually be one of the most powerful women in the White House during the Senior Bush Presidency.  This was no simple journey and she did not “make nice” in the telling of how hard it was for a young, black, mother of three (she was/is married) to make it out of the slums and into the White House.  I can still hear her voice…deep and strong and bold, reverberating on the soul of my young-mother’s heart compelling me to take a good, long look at myself and of the responsibilities I undertook the moment I became a mother. 

Her words have been on my heart all of these years and top my list of my “Never Forget” List of Life lessons:

1)  Love the Lord with all of your heart, your soul, your might.  There is a Godly order in which to love others.  Study His Word and you will find out what that is and go and obey it.

2) Marry a Godly person whose life draws in your soul the desire to love the Lord most. 

3) If you save every child in the World but fail in the raising of the children God gives to you, you will have failed in your #1 mission in life as a mother.  Raise them to know HIM intimately.  Then, let the Lord have his way with your children.  Do it on purpose. 

 

And then, there were lessons from others:  Godly parents, a sibling, and dear friends:

4) Always be striving to be growing spiritually and in the Lord.  This affords a protection of your heart. 

5) Seek out the goodness in others and let go of that which is not good. 

6) Live in the now....ask God to renew your heart daily. 

7) Think appropriately of yourself. You are a child of God and have great worth, be courageous; You are a child of God and are called to serve others.  Be humble. 

8) Be authentic.  This is one of my greatest strivings.  I have lived with inauthenticity in myself and in others.  God cannot live in that environment.  I choose to be authentic and real. 

9) Give of your means.  Don't just give the "interest" or the left-overs to others; give from the center of anything you give because that is where the heart lies. 

10) Forgive.  Seek forgiveness and give forgiveness.  Let go when others do not. 

11)  Tell the truth.  One of the greatest pieces of advice I was given through my divorce was to "tell the full truth and it will set you free".  That was Godly and sage advice.  And, it has. 

12) Never believe YOU have all the answers; never feel you don't have anything worthy to say. 

And, some lessons have come from strangers: 

13) Be yourself.  Don't try to be who others would have you be.  Be who God made you to be. 

14) Laugh.  A lot.  Laughter is one of God's ways given to us to cleanse our souls. 

And, the Greatest lesson comes from Him: 

15) Love

There are many more lessons in my "Never Forget" journal....some intimately powerful, some drawing me to my knees in humility.  All, give me pause to think and the opportunity to see from where I have come on this journey of life. 

Ultimately, at the end of the day it boils down to one true lesson for me. 

Love. 

It is really that simple. 

Love covers many things, all things, everything. 

It seasons the hard times with a softening; it tenders the sad times with gentleness; it covers the good times with humility. 

It is free to the giver to give and free to the receiver to receive. 

It is my life's greatest lessons. 

Blessings,

Lesa

 

 

 

 

 

If It is Monday, It is Mama…..Week 1, Junior Year 

“This past month I have prayed for strength and the ability to cling to hope. This next month, I will be praying to have unconditional faith in God, and patience.”    ~Madison McKenzie

When a mother has cause to catch a glimpse into her daughter’s prayer life, it is a Holy opportunity.  When that daughter is specific in her prayer life, you know the goodness of God.  

And, so thus I was blessed to read the prayer matters of my 22 year old daughter this past weekend.  Included in pink above, I was moved to my knees in gratefulness that I have a daughter who prays not only in her heart but also in black and white.  I believe what you write, you are more likely to achieve. 

So, as I make this page 476 of my lengthy, three-year letter to Madison, “If It Is Monday, It is Mama”, I am humbled…and grateful to have a praying daughter.

Sis, 

It is Monday.  You worked a long, 13 hour night shift at ESH and then traveled on to Richmond to attend your first class of your Junior year at my Alma Mata.  Your text to me in the day’s early hour to let me know you were on your way to campus was a gift to my morning.  By sharing with me your leaving time, I was able to stop what I was doing and pray for your travel safety, that God would give you a reprieve from the fatigue of no sleep and that he would bless your day.  Thank you for sharing your life with me…I am just certain you texted me prior to drivingJ

You and I have been blessed to pray much together, I guess we knew we needed the covering of prayer…and, it has worked.  God has been faithful to keep His hand on us these past 50 and 22 years. 

It is true that when a mother births a child, she has dreams and wishes in her heart of just how that child would grow…I was no exception.  But, very quickly I learned….my image of what you should be was not always in line with what God’s will for you would be.

I wished for you an easy, uncomplicated, simple life.  I wished for mostly happy and fun time with very few challenges.  I wished that joy and peace and love would blanket your heart and keep it safe from ever being hurt or sad or disappointed.  From day nine….April 19^th of your life, it was clear that God had other plans for you….plans to make you strong and independent and sage.  Plans to have a heart too tender and a soul very gentle.

I was not prepared. 

I was not prepared to raise a daughter whose tenderness was so vast that she would get swallowed by life unless she had strong parents to continually lead her back to God and in a Godly way. 

But, God was. 

And, because He was, you are where you are today…on the cuff of starting your life in service to Him.  You work hard, you play hard (sometimes in ways I do not understand) and you love hard. 

Are you perfect?  No

Are you finished?  No

Are you clearly Gods?

Yes…oh yes 

It is a privilege and honor to be your mother.  It is a privilege to watch you move through your life ever learning, sometimes falling, but always picking yourself back up and getting back on the path God has for you.

Grateful I am that God, who knew you before you were born, has a plan…to prosper you and not harm you, to walk beside you and guide you along. 

Grateful I am that you understand that following Him will make “all the difference”…. 

So, as you set off for your first day of classes, this your Junior year, know how grateful I am that you have this opportunity.

As Poppy always says, “Go forth….and do good”…. 

Blessings upon blessings my sweet daughter,

ILYAOYMC, 

Mama

Striving to be His....

Striving to be “His”…

Gone am I and my family for the amount of time it takes to travel to daughter Madison’s college, deposit her belongings, fix up her room, hang her clothes….and traverse back homeward… 

On its surface it was just another busy, time consuming day filled with laughter, fatigue, a little anxiety and much gratefulness…but, in the soul, where things matter big, it was a huge day… 

Made so because, as if in   s  l  o  w   M  o  t  i  o  n, I could see life happening in my child’s life. 

I saw her walk all woman-like into her dorm and secure the home she would have these next nine months at her chosen place of higher education.  She looked over to me waiting to see if I would take over.  But, before I could decline, she stepped forward and took charge. 

Of her life. 

And, I sat….and watched.  Mother love suspended over her like rainbows of light over an earth of green in a sky of true blue, humble gratefulness settled over me that daughter has arrived to this day. 

It is the little things I notice much these days… 

The way she places hand over her mouth when tickled at something funny, the silly face she makes when anxious and the tear-pooled eyes when she is uncertain how to travel forward.

But, I am noticing newness in her behavior which had not been there yesterday. 

She no longer waits on me to encourage her to move ahead…she moves ahead, looks my direction, then moved in the way she has chosen…more confident and certain because she is grounded.

 In Him.

 Perfection in daily behavior, thought and deed is not a goal to ever be achieved because we are all but human vessels without capacity to be perfect, but in my child I witness front row a striving… 

To be “God’s girl” 

Even when she is uncertain what exactly that means; even when she reviews a past of not being “God’s girl; even when she sees brothers and sisters, teachers, leaders, family not being “God’s”. 

She tells me her heart’s desire is to be a hand-holder through this life… 

A Hand Holder…

 

Of family, of friends, of new ones who come into her life.  Of lost souls who travel her path, of patients she cares for at a place where not many would dare to work.   

And, deep in the place of my soul where pride would live if it were a Godly thing, I place gratefulness… 

For in the heart of my student-daughter,

As I leave her at college today.. 

I see a lamb…who, as God has promised…was gathered back into the fold.. 

And, in her heart….her precious, tender, gentle yet strong heart, I am witness… 

To Him….to the goodness of a God who knows each of us by name, loves to brush each hair on our head so he can count them…who knew us before we came to the here and now, when we were just a promise of heaven’s sweetest gifts… 

And I am indebted….in a holy indebtedness to God….who makes children so pure and lovely and wonderful that a mother’s whole soul is filled with joy that it overflows into her own heart.. 

When your child paints a picture of her loving God on the parchment of your heart, you have received a gift which cannot be described in mere words… 

If described at all, it is through the dropping on knees to the whisper of prayer… 

“Thank you, Lord, for the gift of this child…whom although imperfect is made perfect in her striving to be  

Yours…”

 Blessings,

 Lesa

The Power of "Little Kindnesses"

The Power of Little Kindnesses…

Little kindnesses have such power…like little packages of sweetness wrapped up in love’s special ribbon.

Ian and I have a smallish tradition (he says to make up for the past 31 years).  Every time we take a trip, he gets me a little “giftie”…it could be a piece of candy from a favorite candy store or a card from a local card shop.  I have received a single flower from our garden and  poem he wrote “just because”. 

On a recent trip, Ian made special effort to buy me a handmade pair of earrings from a local business in Florida where we were vacationing with my brother and his wife.  We went to several stores, taking in the art of local artisans and in one, The Cedar Chest in Sanibel Island, Florida, found a lovely set of earrings….delicate silver overlaid on gold.

I loved them.

I lost one.

While walking on the beach, hand in hand, as the sun set, somehow one of the earrings must have lost its backing and fallen to the sandy shore.

I was hurt because he had put such effort into selecting them for me…

I don’t consider myself to be a “material girl” for I know we are just passing through, but I did have special affection for this particular set of earrings…

They were a gift freely given from one whose love is fully felt.

But, lost one I did.  Ian, as he is known to do, did not accept the loss without seeking a replacement.  He went to the local business where we purchased the earrings to see if they could find a mate for it.  And, while they did not give us much hope for doing so, they did say they would contact the artist and tell him our story.

And, they did.

And, not only did they find a mate for my lone earring, they did not charge us for it.

They shared this with us….the artist felt for us and our loss on the beach and did not want to charge us for the missing gift.  The store owner kindly agreed to the artist’s request we not be charged.

And so, a few weeks ago, my lost earring was replaced and I am grateful.

For the gift….

For the replacement for the gift.

And, for the generosity of an artist and a business whose hearts were in the giving.

And, for a husband who understands the value of life’s little kindnesses.

Blessed,

Lesa

Nothing "Looks" the Same Now...

Nothing “looks” the same now….

There are times in my life where God has pulled me especially close to him…praying for a sister, losing a best friend because of a drunk driver, father surviving a wreck, mother being healthy, brother safely tucked in bed, PKU, miscarriage, infertility, cancer, divorce, job change, move, and the list goes on and on….and will until my final rest and I meet.

Sometimes, you are pulled into sharing a season of the Lord’s drawing you close with others because of events in their lives….mentally ill child, divorce, abortion, cancer of a sweet baby girl, counting the 100 days of life of a son, attending the funeral of two of a friends precious children, the baptism of a loved one for whom you prayed for 25 years, church growth, children’s ministry, oversees travel, healing from a stroke of a beloved friend, and the list could and does go on and on…and, it too, will until these precious souls meet their final rest.

Nothing looks the same during these seasons in our lives…

Nothing feels the same…

Nothing is the same..

It is then that the rawness of our lives is poured out in the form of our broken hearts and bruised praying knees…when God is especially real and personal and up close with us…

Real.

We are in such a season…

We have a dear friend who is battling for her life here on earth…wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. 

And, nothing in my life and in your life looks the same.

I know this because I, too, wait anxiously each morning, afternoon and evening for an update on our sweet Jana….and, I read your comments, and pray with you your prayers..

And, it is all sweetness..

Reading how so many have been touched by such a tender heart....

Hundreds…thousands of hands being lifted up many, many, many times each day in prayer…and in faith that those prayers are heard by the only ONE who can heal her…

The belief in God’s ability to heal Jana can be felt through the keystrokes of those who so love her and pour out that love in their writing.

The “likes” and comments, photos and Facebook written prayers…they are sweetness.

The love shared commonly among family, friends and even strangers…

It is sweetness…

 So, as I took my nightly walk around my neighborhood, I could feel it….

Nothing looks the same since that Friday when Jana began her battle….

At first, things looked darker, and I confess, even now when the news is not good, it still looks dark.  But, those times come less and less…and, in darkness’ place, is simply a new view of the little things I used to take for granted each time my feet walked the path around my neighborhood…

Not now…

I see things now that I didn’t before because when God drops you to your knees, you are drawn down closer to His creation in a way which only this certain surrendering can provide..

I saw things differently as I walked….things I had looked past previously…

And, I am grateful…

Not for the journey our friend is on…but, that even as she journeys, she has lived such a life that even in the darkness of our fears and anxieties, we are able to see the light of hope…of faith…of  love…

Who Jana loves most is obvious…and it is that love which calls us to prayer…to love…

to believe.

Blessings,

Lesa

Chick Fil A

Chick Fil A

My daughter and I went to run errands this morning and our discussion wrapped itself around the season of grief which has over taken Chick Fil A.

I was proud that she understood that CFA should be allowed it’s right to keep its faith intact, even within its business doors.

I was proud that she understood that no one should have the right to impede the faith walk of another individual or business.

I was proud that she understood that being a Christian was not called to be easy but that it was worthy.

I told her a hard and sad truth….I will never be able to own a Chick Fil A business.

I am divorced.

Because I am divorced, I do not meet the Biblical standards of CFA.

That saddens me because my husband and I have discussed owing a CFA and did not know this truth until recently.  They have very rigid standards, such as no debt, etc. and we meet them all, except for this one.

Now, I could rant and rave and cry discrimination…and, it is.

But, that would be wrong.

The Bible is clear on God’s stand against divorce.

And, even though I have Biblical reasons for my divorce (as does my ex-husband), I still chose divorce and in so doing, forever removed myself from the ability to own a Chick fil A because their faith standard does not accept my life's choices.

humbly, oh so humbly,

I accept and understand and respect their beliefs.

Because, I believe this truth…

I believe God's ways are the only ways....

And, I believe that...

No one should impede on the faith belief of another.  That is God’s job.

My daughter asks, “but what if they are sacrificing children for their faith?”  A good question.

I would hope to do all I could to save the children.

I hope I would have opportunity to share God’s Word with them.

But, ultimately, at the end of the day, that is all we can do..

And, pray.

I admire Chick Fil A’s stand for Christ….

It is their right to have their faith in God.

And, I admire that they will stand strong for their belief in His Word.

I have consequences in my life for not doing so, and it has forever changed me and my family….I praise them for realizing what I did not.

Our God is who we should follow….not just when it is easy.

But, always and in every way and in bold ways.

Blessings,

Lesa

Seeking the Face of Jesus….

“Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always.”  I Chronicles 16:11

How precious….how mighty when the family comes together to seek the face of Jesus…..when people stop from their work and their play to pray.  When little children fold tiny hands and say sweet words to Jesus.  When senior citizens with crackly voices sing Amazing Grace and word messages to God.  When adults hold hands across the pew, the neighborhood fence the internet to lift up another...

Prayer Warriors standing together

As only God’s children can do…

Seeking HIS face, and HIS grace

For another….

In this case, there is a wealth of impassioned warriors kneeling, standing, and bending in prayer…for a sister.

A precious, gentle, kind-hearted sister..

Jana

Whose life is so Godly that all who know her have feel the presence of Jesus in her actions, her words, her deeds.

A humble sister, battling for health and wholeness, a miracle of complete healing by a God who is the Miracle Maker.

We believe in God’s power to heal

And, we claim it….

As His children, we claim it…

As His Sheep….His students….His heart….

We stand together, in prayer

And we believe…

Blessings,

Lesa

Kindness Lives In Our Home

Kindness lives in our home

There is a quiet kindness which is living in our home.  I have noticed it more and more this past year and while not fully honed into perfection (I am not certain there is such a thing), it has found root again and begun to grow.

And, in its growing, has made all the difference.

A counselor told me over three years ago two life lessons which have made all the difference in my and my children’s lives.  It is advice we work very hard to live by…even when it is not easy.

One….”always tell the whole truth all the time because in doing so, you are set free” and

Two…”pursue kindness with all people, at all times even when it is not returned”

Genuinely

Her premise was that in living out God’s expectation that we are kind and love one another, that eventually, it will take root and grow and bring about change. 

We took her advice very seriously and did as she recommended….even when it was not easy.  Even in the face of adversity. 

And, I am grateful.

Because somehow along life’s path, kindness has removed itself from our presence.  I don’t think it is a matter of who’s to blame or who started it on its path…what matters is that it left…

We felt the leaving.

Just as we now feel its return.

And, in with its return, joy has joined us as well.

You can hear it in the way we speak to one another, in the way we look out for one another….in the way we stand in front of one another…

Does it live in perfection at our home?  Oh no….I am not sure there is such a thing.

But, as surely as our garden has taken root and now nourishes our family with the bounty of its offerings,

So, too, has the root of kindness taken hold in the garden of our family.

And, I for one, am grateful.

Blessings,

Lesa

What Becomes Important When You Cannot See?

What becomes Important when you cannot see? 

Ian gifted me with a sunset dinner cruise on the Belle of Louisville, the oldest still running steamboat in the United States.  It was a lovely dinner on a lovely ship at a lovely time of the evening…sunset.

As we took our turn in line, we noticed that there were a substantial number of ship guests who were blind and who were walking with seeing-eye dogs and/or canes used by the blind.  The number of such guests was so substantial that we surmised there must be a convention in Louisville and the group decided to join us on our ship ride. 

Of course, the general seeing population gave way to these individuals, special accommodations were made to get them seated, to assist them in securing their dinner and to arranging that their spot on the top of the ship for sightseeing was secured. 

Quiet courtesy was afforded each unsighted person by those who surrounded them.  Unspoken kindnesses. 

It was moving. 

There was no pity from the crowd.  There was no awkward gawking…or too long of glances…there was just 

Unspoken kindness.

It was touching…moving me to tears.  Citizens from all over the state, country and world politely gave up their space in line to offer it to another.   

Hands moved to arms to position a person in the line.  Arms went through arms to draw a person close.  Arms went about shoulders to move forward an individual. 

Like an orchestra of gentility….or waves of compassion…those who could not see were assured the best spot on the ship just so their faces could feel the sweet breeze on their faces…. 

Breezes which would draw a picture that their eyes could not see. 

And, sweeter still…. 

These sightless friends had a bold carefulness about them which could not help but draw in our seeing eyes’ hearts… 

They did not tread fearfully around they ship….they walked surely and boldly and trustingly.  As if their life depended on being confident in the steps they took. 

As if they had learned the hard lesson to have faith in the unseen and in their ability to transverse the terrain of life not having a clear picture of the path but having faith in the journey. 

Powerful. 

The feel of “grace” was palpable….tangible…. 

“the elegance, beauty, smoothness of movement;  dignified, polite and decent behavior; generosity of spirit, a capacity to tolerate, accommodate, or forgive”

And, while their eyes might not be able to take in the beauty and wonder of the sights around us…the strong and bulking ship, the beauty of the woodworking on board, the lovely landscapes we passed by with each wave…while their eyes never beheld the little children dancing and the waves lapping on shore and even the orange-sherbet sunset, they saw.

They saw. 

As surely as I believe in God, I felt their “seeing”…..the lilt of their head to capture a breeze and draw deeply a breath evidencing an inner vision… 

It was as if God was in their body drawing for them a picture right on their hearts. You could see the moment it happened…their posture drawing up and their heads tilting slightly back as they drew in their view…

Closing eyes which could not see to open spirits which could. 

Soaking up the warmth of the sunset….drawing in the sounds of lapping waves as they hit the shore. 

And you could feel it… 

Peace 

They were at peace.  

Soaking in the moments of majesty that sea and wind and life could offer.  Drawing in a calm that came from accepting.   

Tenderly, willingly, gently embracing….. 

And, we wondered…what do we who see miss? 

And, what would truly become important if we could not see? 

Would the color of our clothes, the model of our car or even the leather of our Bible matter?  Would painting our homes or choosing a dog or burning the toast matter? 

Instead, would the words that we speak, the little moments of listening, the singing of our family be that which touched our hearts? 

Would the laughter of children, the feel of soft cotton pillows and taste of sweet oranges bring joy? 

I can see and I am grateful that I was born with and still have the favor of my sight.  Thank you God, for my eyes and the windows to the world they provide. 

But, as surely as the sun will rise tomorrow, God willing, so, too, do these new friends see…and, I am not certain that what they see is not more worthy…more heartfelt….more joyous… 

Because while they don’t see with their eyes…as do I… 

They clearly see with their hearts, their spirits…. 

And, I am moved…to slow down…to appreciate…. 

And, to consider, 

“What would become important if I could not see?” 

Blessings,

Lesa