Home is where you go to listen to wiser words then yours....

"OUT OF THE WRECK I RISE"
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?
Romans 8:35

God does not keep a man immune from trouble; He says - "I will be with him in trouble." It does not matter what actual troubles in the most extreme form get hold of a man's life, not one of them can separate him from his relationship to God. We are "more than conquerors in all these things." Paul is not talking of imaginary things, but of things that are desperately actual; and he says we are super-victors in the midst of them, not by our ingenuity, or by our courage, or by anything other than the fact that not one of them affects our relationship to God in Jesus Christ. Rightly or wrongly, we are where we are, exactly in the condition we are in. I am sorry for the Christian who has not something in his circumstances he wishes was not there.
"Shall tribulation...?" Tribulation is never a noble thing; but let tribulation be what it may - exhausting, galling, fatiguing, it is not able to separate us from the love of God. Never let cares or tribulations separate you from the fact that God loves you.
"Shall anguish...?" - can God's love hold when everything says that His love is a lie, and that there is no such thing as justice?
"Shall famine...?" - can we not only believe in the love of God but be more than conquerors, even while we are being starved?
Either Jesus Christ is a deceiver and Paul is deluded, or some extraordinary thing happens to a man who holds on to the love of God when the odds are all against God's character. Logic is silenced in the face of every one of these things. Only one thing can account for it - the love of God in Christ Jesus. "Out of the wreck I rise" every time.

(Taken from "My Utmost for His Highest")


Amen.

Blessings,
Lesa

Home is where you go to “let go”……

I have started a new chapter in my life.  It is bittersweet in that I never ever expected to be here.  But, here I am.  It is bittersweet in that I had to learn to let go….and, while now I have peace, I also have broken little pieces inside me which I believe I will carry for the rest of the balance of my days here on earth.  The only reason I can carry these pieces is that I do not carry them alone…God’s hands are wrapped around every little broken fragment and I know that healing will come.

Letting go of anything is not an easy process….in fact, it is not a process, it is a journey.  And, in my case my faith belief that God can do all things enabled me to stay in a place where otherwise I would have long ago let go.  As I look back I see that there was a purpose for this journey and while I don’t see it fully at this writing, I am able to see small vignettes of purpose each day.

A friend told me early on in this journey that while God is not always happy with our decisions, He never leaves us nor forsakes us as we struggle to find our way.  I know this to be truth.

I have made some tough decisions these past three years….frankly, some which those around me struggle with.  But, as one of my children told me just today, “Mom, we have walked the journey with you…we know truth….”and, in that I can find peace.

So, as I begin this new chapter, I will do as a wise woman told me…..let go.

Let go and let God be my guiding light in an even more and sincere and deep way…..

I thought I knew him before….but, now I realize that I am just at the beginning of knowing Him.

I have peace in my life.  Peace which passeth all understanding.  And, I believe it comes from God.

And, in that peace I can find it to “let go”…

Blessings

Lesa

Home is where God awakens you in the early morning to spend time with Him…

I am not sure why, but for some reason, I find myself waking up in the early morning with the inability to return to sleep and the need to talk with God…these early am prayers are precious to my heart.  Time alone with just me and God…time to reflect on my life and the life of my family.

Time alone to think about the past and to rejoice in the future.

It’s quiet in my home at 4 am or 5 am or whatever early am time I am awakened by God.  It is a unique quiet…a different kind of quiet.  I do not awaken frustrated that I cannot sleep as sometimes I do…rather, I awaken with the knowledge that if I will get up and make the time to be “present” with God, I will receive a blessing that only He can give.

            God chooses very interesting times in my life to draw me to this early am prayer….not at all what I would chose…when I had little twin babies and so very much needed my sleep, I would be awakened in the wee hours to spend time with Him.  When I have been up all night with worry over a daughter who was out with friends and she comes in…I remained awake….with God.

            When I had a big project at work and needed my rest so desperately so that I would do well the next day, I could not sleep until God and I talked.

            And, very early on I learned that IF I would obey his calling of my name and make time to be in prayer and talking, He would carry me through whatever came my way the next day.

            God is like that.  He loves it when we sit beside him, lay our weary heads on his shoulder and talk.  He loves it when we kneel beside him and share our joys and our tender moments of life.  He loves it when we share our happy moments and he loves us through our sad.

            Like a good parent, God just likes us to be with him.  He knows the more we are present with Him, the more of Him is present WITHIN us. 

            And, Him being God….blesses us in ways no other can bless us….

            I have a favorite quote, “when you get to the bottom of yourself, you get to the beginning of God”….this is not a thing you do one time in your life.  I believe you do this again and again, because in our humanity, we forget to keep God front and center.  We don’t heed his calling and go be with Him…we try to take on things alone.  And, we cannot.  So, He allows us to get to the bottom of ourselves so that we are forced to come sit at His feet and take time to be with Him…to talk with Him…it’s not a thing He does so much out of discipline of us, although I think it can be, but mostly He does this out of love…because he knows that the more we are with Him, the more of our worth, value and purpose can be made known to us…

            Each of us is here on earth for a brief time and for a Holy purpose.  Some of us “get it” early on that God has a purpose and from early on, we head that direction.  Some, not so much.  Some of us take time to grow, develop.  The great thing is, God loves us regardless of which we are..all He asks is that as we search for our purpose that we use Him as our guide…and live it out in His name.

            We do that by using those gifts He gave us to use…His Word, the avenue of prayer, the gift of family, the treasure of church fellowship, and other things.

            Those who are wise…or maybe who are humbly aware know the value of using these gifts to draw themselves closer to God.  I love those who have this figured out…I love sitting in the presence of a Godly man or woman who is authentic in his/her walk with God.  They seem to have a peace about them which is found through many, many hours spent with God.  They are humble…they are gentle, their eyes are kind and their hearts are soft.  They don’t seem to talk a lot…maybe because they do all their talking with God.

            The words which they use when they do speak are provoking because of their insight…

            People who are close with God are different…you can feel their love of God is greater than their love of life….

            They have answered the call many early mornings to go be with Him.  They have stayed on their knees more than on their feet.  They have laid down their burdens at the feet of the only one who can really remove them.  The know the value of spending time with the only one who can truly make a difference.

            I want to be one of these people…

Blessings,

Lesa

Home…you are led there by the example of your parents…

When  I was unpacking boxes as the kids and I move into our new home, I found my Daddy’s Bible  from my Mama on Valentine’s Day 1976.  Daddy had asked me in 1983 what I wanted for my birthday and I told him I wanted his “blue” Bible.  And, as he promised, that is what I received.  On my next visit home from college after my birthday he walked up to me, handed me the Bible and said, “here it is…not sure why you want it but it is yours to keep.”  And, then he smiled really big…..

I wanted his Bible because I had been told you can learn much about a person by what they underline in their personal Bible.  I think this is true.  I heard this again at my sister’s father-in-law’s funeral…the minister read scripture which had been underlined in Mr. Reneau’s Bible and it was a precious memorial to a Godly man’s life.  I was changed by hearing what was said about him that day.  Just as I was changed by the things my Daddy had underlined in his Bible.

A favorite and strong memory I carry with me of my Daddy is of him sitting at our family’s kitchen table preparing for a  sermon, a lesson, service of communion or just reading for the comfort which  from reading his Bible.  I have seen Daddy in the wee hours of the morning reading…I have seen him rushing to prepare a lesson as substitute for a sick teacher, I have seen him burning his candle late into the evening preparing for a wedding.  As a child, you cannot help but be changed by the example of your Daddy studying the Word.  What I write here could be said of my mother as well.  Both are strong prayer warriors and significant WORD readers.  Both are intimate with God and if you are around them much at all, you can feel His presence in their words, actions and speech. They are authentic and real.  They love God and their family and their friends, and, in that order.

Daddy’s Bible is what you would call “worn out”…The blue cover has been masking taped to the binding, the blue has long faded from my Daddy’s big hands opening and closing it.  There are many pages which no longer are attached, having given up their service to repeated reference over the years.

The hand written notes in my Daddy’s handwriting have to make God smile….evidence of a man seeking God’s own heart is clear.  Ink is blue, green, red and purple.  Some times there are dates next to scripture.  And, what is amazing to me is that almost every book in his Bible has some sort of note in it.  Of course, some books, The Gospels, Deuteronomy, Corinthians….have received much ink.

Daddy’s Bible has the life of Christ highlighted, marriage, forgiveness, love.  He read frequently in Ephesians…there is yellow highlighting, red ink, blue ink and many many notes.   Childrearing, our spiritual walk, the importance of faith are all topics covered by Daddy. 

You can read of my Daddy’s spiritual maturity in his personal notes.  Things which were big issues in 1976 seemed more clear to him by 1983.  His was a journey for clarity and it is evident in his writing that he succeeded in obtaining a better understanding of our God.

Very sweet to me is the handwriting of my brother, Jim, In the back notes of our Daddy’s blue Bible…evidence of a son’s following in the footsteps of a Godly father.  Jim, perhaps more than any of my other siblings seems to have a passion for reading scripture and trying to follow the heart of God’ s will for our lives. 

Sweeter still is the handwriting of one of my younger siblings, “I love you too much”….I guess they were writing that to our Daddy…for beside it on the next page is that little handwriting , “Chester Lee Millstead”.  Obviously, this was a child who knew for certain to whom the Blue Bible belonged.

Precious is my Daddy’s Bible, precious are his notes, but even more precious is the amount of time he spent striving to know his heavenly Father more intimately.

I am the daughter of a Godly father.  And mother.

There is no greater gift you can give your children.

They were and are not perfect people or parents.  But, they both live a life in service and seeking of God…and, for us as their children and grand-children, that has made all the difference.

Blessings,

Lesa

Home is where you go for Freedom...where the truth shall set you free..

Home is where you go for Freedom….where the Truth shall set you Free…..

I learned a powerful lesson this week.  Actually, it was a lesson I knew  already, I have applied it to my life for its duration; however, the power of the lesson was made especially real to me this week.

“The truth shall set you free”….

My beloved counselor, Rhonda, had shared this with me over a year ago as we battled through some difficult personal struggles.  She encouraged me from day one to “live in truth” in all things with all people at all times.  She encouraged me that even when truth was not brought to me through others, to be truthful  back.  She reminded me that painful truth is better than “pretty lies”…..a lesson learned early in my life through my parent’s teachings…

She reminded me that to draw closer to God, you had to be truthful.

That God and truth cannot live apart from one another.

She reminded me that only those who “walk the journey with me” were deserving of my personal truth…to all others, gentle silence is Godly.

She taught me to pull on God’s truth, not worldly truth...

God’s truth is always encased in love, compassion, gentleness and forgiveness.

God’s truth is freely given, quietly preserved and powerfully blessed.

I took Rhonda’s advice this year…..I became more quiet…

And, in my solitude, I found the comfort that only God can provide.  I found a peace that you cannot get from any other place but God’s tender care for you…

I learned to look at myself for personal truth and not to look toward others..

So, when a painful truth was brought to my attention this week, I was prepared.  As only God can do, he had been preparing me for a long time for this particular truth….

While I confess, for a moment, I stumbled….pain dropped me to my knees and broke my heart, this time, I was able to pull myself up quickly….calmly and appropriately…

And, this time I felt the freedom which comes from telling AND from knowing truth….and, it really does set you free….

Rhonda was right….truth is the foundation for a Godly life.  Truth with yourself.  Truth with others.  Truth given.  Truth received.

Truth causes you to put yourself “in the other person’s shoes”….it grows compassion in your heart when it would otherwise be absent.

Truth makes you real…

Truth draws you closer to God….who is Truth.

It is a personal decision…..

I chose Truth…

Blessings,

Lesa

Love your Dog....especially Today.....

Love your Dog…especially today…..

We buried our eleven year old dog, Jewel last evening as the sun set.  Having already written about her in a previous post, I won’t do so again at such length.

What I do hope to encourage all of us to do is tell those whom we love that we love them…even including your family pets.

Jewel a’ la Champion was a treasure to our family’s life. 

Rather than be sad because of her absence, we are choosing to be joyful for her life.

We are better individuals because of Jewel….we are kinder, gentler, and more compassionate.

She taught us the value of slowing down for life…the importance of taking time for a warm hug…the significance of always being there for one another.

She reminded us that baths don’t have to be an every day thing, walks around the block don’t have to be on leashes and sneaking home at midnight will not go unnoticedJ

She was faithful, loyal and protective.

She was a gift to us….

We are grateful.

Blessings on your day…..

Hugs to you and your family pets as well..

~Lesa

Home is where you THANK GOD for the blessing of your Daughter...

Home is where you go to thank God for your Daughter…

Madison Elizabeth Jewel McKenzie was born at 8:32pm on April 10, 1990 in Lexington, Kentucky. 

Her birth was planned, prepared and prayed for.

She was the “first” in many ways…first child to her Dad and I, first Grandchild to my parents, first niece to my siblings, first coo and giggle in our home, first pooey diaper, first car ride in an infant seat, first baby bath, first stroller ride, first early am nursing, first “month” birthday singing, first  lullaby song, first of every holiday.  She was first to win the hearts of her family who fell helplessly in love with her every move..every coo…every smile.

We knew Madison was going to be special long before she arrived in person…we could feel it in our souls…in the way we felt called to pray for her….in the gentle movements she made….

Madison, in utero, kept me up at night and slept all day…I can remember rocking my gently pregnant belly at church as if she were already in my arms…hoping to keep her awake so she would “sleep” at  night when I needed to sleep…to no availJ

Madison did not come easily into this world…she required 18 hours of labor and a pair of “forceps” to her little head before we finally were blessed to hear her first cry….it was strong and it was sweet music to my ears.

I remember the nurse saying “Mom and Dad, she’s a strong one…she’s a fighter”..and, that nurse was right.

There are many things I could write and share about Madison…to open the door so you could have a peek into her life…and, if I did, you would be forever changed by the things which have brought her challenge….

                                                            

Hard things, serious things, sad things, painful things.

But, then that is how she would be defined forever in your minds and that is not what I want you to remember about my daughter…

Madison is the most precious gift from God I have ever received.

I remember so many sweet things about her…the way her fingers curled around my long, brown hair as she nursed in the early am hours…just Madison and me…Mama and daughter.

I can feel her sweet little “milk breath” on my neck as I held her on my shoulder to burp her…it was a warm, sweet little velvet breath and when I close my eyes, I can draw back to those moments..

I remember her first smile…it lit up the room and my heart.

I remember her first out loud laugh…I cried with joy for the laughter yet to come.

I remember well the midway point of my maternity leave thinking and praying to God…”please help us find a way to keep me home with my baby…I cannot imagine going back to work and leaving her”…praying this prayer became my daily mission…first thing in the morning…many times during the day and at night before I shut my eyes…this way my prayer.

I was a Mother who wanted nothing more than to leave behind my career and stay home to be a mother to my precious daughter.

Frankly, financially, it would not be possible……

Or, would it.

You see, one thing Madison’s life has taught me is that with God all things…ALL things…ALL THINGS are possible…

And, as God is want to do, He provided a way….

And thus started the 21 year love story between mother and daughter….

Madison’s early life required of me that which I had never really had to do before…it required self sacrifice….

Not just the normal parent self sacrifice, but a fully committed, fully invested, fully educated and fully expended giving of my personhood….

Madison was and still is an “investment”…

But, she is the best investment I can ever make and I believe in her 110%....

Madison is a lot of things…of that we learned very early in her life..

She is verbal…she started saying words…real words so early it startled people.

She is mobile…she took her first step at 9 months and 11 days and we have video to prove itJ

She is playful…Madison is most happy when she is happy…yes, she really is.

She finds happiness in the silliest of ways…climbing the tallest tree, swinging the highest in the swing, “twirling”, jumping, leaping, soaring from bed to bed.

If it made her laugh, it made her try it….

She is a daredevil, much to my chagrin…

She is deep….Madison’s thoughts catch me off guard at times with the depth of her thought process

She is a “secret keeper”….Madison has always understood the value of keeping what someone tells you in confidence and never sharing it.  If you need someone to share a private moment with, Madison is the one to go to.

Madison is authentic…Madison is probably one of the most real people I know…Good, bad or whatever, she is who she is…and who you see is who she is.

Madison is a writer, a singer, a poet…from very early in her life she could take words and put them together in such a way as to provoke thought on your part.

Madison is  “Sprite”….a light spirit who is playful, teasing and joyful.

Madison is a “POW”….some would say, her mother’s daughter in that wayJ (You’ll have to figure that one out on your own).

Madison is a warrior….from nine days old until today, Madison has had a battle that most of you reading this have not had to have your child face.  Thank God.

Because of that battle, Madison has faced some struggles in her life which most children…young adults do not face. Thank God.

Some battles, she managed well…some not so much.

But, the one thing I admire most about Madison is that she has never, not once given up.  She may have stumbled, she may have rebelled, she may have even taken a wrong path at times, but she never gave up…she never lost sight…she never forgot “whose Girl” she was.

And, frankly, because of her battles, she has a heart I would not trade for anything….hers is a “velvet over steel heart”….one which is so gentle and tender toward others, which can see into a person’s heart so quickly…which has deep, deep compassion .

One of my very favorite things about Madison is her ability to put herself “in your shoes”…..when she loves you, it is deeply and forever.  When she befriends you, it is with her whole heart..when she is mad at you, it is with thunder and lightning…but, when she holds you dear, it melts your heart in a way which cannot be written on paper..

She is not perfect, nor does she strive to be.

She is not always positive, she has reasons for her skewed view of life at times, but she is working on this…..and, as I write this today, I believe this will be different in her next 21 years.

She expresses more than she should at times, but by that sharing, you come to know her.

And, in the knowing of her, you are changed.

And blessed.

My daughter….valiant warrior, kind and gentle princess, soldierette for God, journey seeker, thought provoker, compassionate and cherished friend…

My daughter….today I bestow on you my Mother’s blessing..

“May God bless each and every day of your life as only He can.  May God call your name gently and sweetly and draw you close to Him.  May He fill your heart in such a way that you never feel alone.  May He heal each and every single hurt you have ever suffered, may he touch each wound and kiss it with His healing…May he take your physical body and grow it strong and healthy.  May the beauty that He knitted together in my womb be renewed and re-birthed in such a way that you, too, are able to see what we see…a kind, compassionate, gentle, tender, intelligent, hard-working, strong and soulful woman.

May the view of yourself when you see it reflected in others be truth…always.

May you have the courage to take the path God has set before you and be bold in the taking…surrendering yourself totally to God and having confidence that where He takes you will make you “what you ought to be”.

May you, from this day forward, live in truth with yourself…and God…for in the doing so, you will find that one path…that will lead to fulfilling your true purpose here on earth.

May you see in yourself all the beauty that is you…my sweet and Precious Madison.

I love you as only your Mama can (ILYAOYMC).

I thank God every single day, but especially on this day for giving me the honor and privilege of being your Mother…

For you, I am forever grateful,

Love,

Mama

Home is where you go to be Amazed and Changed...

Home is where you go to be amazed and changed…

Madison and I said goodbye to our last beach sunrise this morning…

I loved being with her in the stillness of the wee hours…

For a long while, it was just Madison and me…and God.

Few words were spoken…there was just a quiet gentleness between us, mother and daughter.

There are times in your child’s life where all you can do is walk beside them…when holding their hand isn’t even an option…when the time for giving advice is past…

There are so many things I want to say…so much advice I would like to offer…so many situations I want to warn her about.  But, I am just her mother.  What I truly sincerely sole-heartedly want for her is…

                    ………. to grow closer to God..to rely solely on Him.

I want her to draw closer to Him in prayer and confidence that  like the North Star we watched this morning, He is our only “true North”….the one who will never disappoint, never forsake you, never leave you.

And, while I could have taken time this morning to give her a “lesson” about all of this, I didn’t.  While I could have verbalized so many things to my daughter, hoping to draw changes in her life, I couldn’t.

For I have learned that all I can do is live my life in such a way that she will see God in me…in my behavior, in my actions, my words, my deeds.

Like all parents…mothers, I have succeeded at times in doing this and I have failed at times in doing this.

What I have learned and am learning it that is why it is important to “live in truth” with yourself, with God and with your loved ones.  For no one is fooled, least of all your children.

Your children have a peek into your heart which is unique only to them.  They come to know you in a way you cannot (and should not) want to disguise…it should be that you can lay bare your soul to your children and that what they see is love….kindness..gentleness…meekness..joy..peace…patience…self control.

I have not always been that for my children.  The pain from this truth is almost unbearable.  But, I aspire to live in this way, and in my aspiration to do so, I have found peace.

That is what I prayed this morning for my daughter, Madison….peace.

Peace which comes only from the one who knitted her together.

Peace which comes from freely giving over her heart to the One who loves her “most”

Peace which is elusive if you rely on earthly people, things to make you happy.

I pray for her heart to surrender to God….just as the clouds gave way in surrender to the sun’s heat this morning.

I pray for surrender….to the path that will lead her home.

I pray for surrender…of her heart to the One whose love grows and changes a person..

And, just as the sunrise we shared together…mother and daughter..this morning, I believe when she surrenders…she will find all she is seeking…

She will be Amazed….and, she will be forever Changed….

As will I,

Blessings,

Lesa

Through the Storms and the Sunrises comes Perspective....

I am amazed this morning at the beauty “after the storm”….because yesterday, our beachfront view was cloudy and gray and thunder surrounded us.  It was slightly frightening to be so close to the edge of the beach..to see the storm coming our way and to be helpless to stop it.

The sky which had been soft blue, rose pink and slightly yellow had turned into a swirl of dark black, gray and dirty white.  The waves which had once been friendly and bounding with playful energy were now large and frothy and angry looking.

Our safe haven on the beach had been replaced with an unknown bully of a storm.

It lasted only hours but it felt like forever.

We read books, napped, watched tv and discussed what we would do in case we needed to evacuate.

We played Phase Ten, Yahtzee and Backgammon.

We waited…

And, finally, we went to bed exhausted with “doing nothing” all day…

But, as surely as the sun rises each morning, so did the beauty of our beach sunrise ...

And, I truly believe that the sunrise this morning is even more beautiful than it was these past few days…or, is it maybe that my appreciation for the view been enhanced when compared to the stormy day before?

Perspective is everything.  I believe that.

I can fully appreciate the intricate stitching of the morning’s sky a little more fully today because I have yesterday’s stormy one with which to compare.

Like life, my view has been changed by comparison….by my new perspective.

The children and I talked at length yesterday about how perspective molds who we are....if your perspective is molded by love and compassion and heart, you are more likely to forgive, to let go, to assist.

If your perspective is formed by judgment, anger or dispassionate thought, you are more likely to become harsh, cold, bitter.

If you are able to put yourself “in the shoes of another”, you are able to walk beside them and to be their friend.

But, if you cannot, then you cannot.

I want my children to be compassionate.  I want them to use their life’s experiences in a positive way to assist others.

Rather than deny that storms have come their way, I pray they are able to learn from the storms and be more sensitive to the storms of others.

We are not there yet.  We may never get there, but it is a goal..

Just as yesterday’s storm frightened us and worried us and made us realize that there is a power greater than we are who guides our lives, the beauty of today which came after the storm reminds us that that power wants good and beautiful and lovely things for us.

It is our ability to perceive that truth which will mold how we walk our days.

I choose to walk mine in faith…and, with a positive perspective.

Blessings,
Lesa

Home....is where you go to find time with God...

I love the early morning…when everyone is asleep and quiet permeates the house, or in this case the condo on the beach.

There is something sacred about the early morning hours….the Holy quiet where you and your thoughts are alone. 

Where it is quiet enough to hear God.

I pray for each of us this early morning as I sit and watch the sunrise to find some time today to be alone…

Just us an God…

God and us…

And, in that time, I pray that we are changed…

Blessings,

Lesa

Home is where you go to be changed.....

I love the early morning…when everyone is asleep and quiet permeates the house, or in this case the condo on the beach.

There is something sacred about the early morning hours….the Holy quiet where you and your thoughts are alone. 

Where it is quiet enough to hear God.

I pray for each of us this early morning as I sit and watch the sunrise to find some time today to be alone…

Just us an God…

God and us…

And, in that time, I pray that we are changed…

Blessings,

Lesa

Home is where you go to fulfill your "bucket list".......

Each January 1st for 25 years, our family has filled out our "wish list"...later called our "goal list" and more recently called our "Bucket List".

The whole point of the "list" whatever it is called is to set goals for the year.

I have kept every single list for each one of us....

I cherish these lists...at four, the kids put things like...

I wish...

   for a dog, to become President of the US, to have my ears pierced, a pet turtle, to go to Washington DC

Later, the lists grew into things like this..

I wish...

    to make straight A's, to make the volleyball team, to make the baseball team, to go to Hong Kong, to go on a church mission trip…

And, more recently, their lists have included...

   to be baptized (all three have been), for Papaw to be baptized, to take a family vacation,  to go to Harry Potter World, to go on a cruise, for peace…for joy and laughter…

We have written out our lists for every year these past 25 except for last year (2010)….and, I confess, that year was a tough one.  I’ll always wonder about what if….But, we are back on track with 2011…and, while our “bucket list” write a little differently this year, re-kindling the “Bucket List”  has revived our spirit of fun and adventure…it has re-set the clock for our belief that “through God all things are possible”…..it has re-ignited our passion for pursuing things which matter in life to our family…different as we are now.

This year’s list included things like…

     Have a home we can be proud of and invite our friends over all the time, be the “go to” home for our friends, take a trip to the ocean, play more family games together, have a pool, sit in a new place at church,  work at the Hope Center every other month rather than every month, live in truth, be healthier, eat better, invite over to our home kids who would not otherwise be invited over, do some daring things such as jump the “Pit”, read our Bibles through in a year, eat breakfast for dinner on Sunday nights, get our driver’s license, go see our grandparents more, have our grandparents come see us more, have my brothers and I be closer and talk more, pray my daughter move back home and return to college, give back to others more than we take from them, be good listeners, have more compassion to the less fortunate, be real with our friends…don’t sit on the sidelines watching them struggle, go to them and be there for them…BE REAL like the Velveteen Rabbit..

I find it interesting as I wrote our Bucket List items above, just how many we have already accomplished…some purposefully, and some by God’s divine provision.

I have always loved our annual rite of preparing the “list”, whatever we call it because it is a written reminder of a purposeful heart. 

I like it even more so when my children have a purposeful heart…I think God does as well.


If a Bucket List assists us in having a purposeful heart for the future as it has in the past, we will once again be Bucket List writers….

So, as I head down to the beach, where the ocean waves are bringing in the new morning’s sunrise, I smile……joy comes in the morning, just as He promises. 

I claim that joy.

I claim it in my heart…I claim it in my soul…

And, I claim it in writing…from HIS writing to my family’s Bucket List.

Blessings,

Lesa

Home is where you go to Celebrate Your Birthday....

I am forty-nine today…one year removed from fifty.

And, as I woke up this morning with the realization that God was “yes” going to bless me with another day here on earth, I was humbled to understand that I have three individuals to whom I owe much gratitude and appreciation.

Two of those  individuals came together in love to carry me and then give birth to me…my parents, Chet and Shirle Millstead.

One of those individuals left His earthly home to come and die for me so that I, too, may reside with Him one day, His counterpart which guides my life and fills my soul…the Holy Spirit, and their counterpart, the very one whose knitting together brought me into this very existence….God

To all three, I am grateful.

It is important that I fully understand the importance of these individuals in my life for they are the foundation for my whole purpose in existing…

I have learned much these past 49 years….but, one of my favorite things is that….

“When you get to the bottom of yourself, you get to the beginning of God”…..

I can assure you, I have gotten to the current “bottom” of my life this past ten years…..yes, I could go lower as there are many pains I have been blessed to avoid; but, I have been to the “valley of the shadow of death”…to the “point where anguish becomes your friend”…

However, as I tell my children, you are not to “live” there at the bottom.  I believe you are allowed to “go there” because some times it takes that for you to have a change of heart…a new conviction…a new awakening…

You go there to become different.

You go there to become kinder, gentler

You go there to become humbled

You go there to accept forgiveness

You go there to accept cleansing

You go there to accept love

It is a journey, this life we are on…and in this journey, we have to chose many things….

But, the greatest choice is “for Whom do I live?”

You will make many choices, wise choices, silly choices, even at times obscene and sinful choices, but you are NOT to live in those choices.

Celine Dion has a song I listen to daily…there were periods of times these past 20 months that I listened to it 20 times a day….I totally relate to the words….I have lain in bed at night hearing them, I have driven down the road to them, I have heard them while at ballgames and possibly even while talking with many of you…

"The Prayer"

I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way
Lead us to the place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe

I pray we'll find your light

and hold it in our hearts.

When stars go out each night,

The light you have
I pray we'll find your light
will be in the heart
and hold it in our hearts.
to remember us that
When stars go out each night,
you are eternal star
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
quanta fede c'e
when shadows fill our day

How much faith there's
Let this be our prayer
in my prayer
when shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

We dream a world without violence
a world of justice and faith.
Everyone gives the hand to his neighbors
Symbol of peace, of fraternity
La forza che ci da
We ask that life be kind
e il desiderio che
and watch us from above
ognuno trovi amor
We hope each soul will find
intorno e dentro se
another soul to love

The force his gives us
We ask that life be kind
is wish that
and watch us from above
everyone finds love
We hope each soul will find
around and inside
another soul to love
Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer, just like every child

Need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
Need to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

E la fede che
hai acceso in noi,
sento che ci salvera

It's the faith
you light in us
I feel it will save us

I consider this song one of God’s little gifts to light my way on this life’s journey…

I consider many of you God’s little gifts to sweeten and light my way on this life’s journey…

I am a blessed woman….and, especially today, I want to reflect on how grateful I am….how truly truly lucky it is to be Chet and Shirle’s daughter, Madison, Joseph, Kenton and Johnson’s Mama, my siblings’ sister and my precious friends’ friend…

Thanks to each of you who has been a sweet light of love, compassion, joy and laughter to me these past 49 years; to those of you who have walked beside me as I have journeyed through life, who have sung with me, danced with me and prayed with me; who have walked with me, “yoga’d” with me, moved with me..

YOU are the best birthday present to me that I have ever been blessed to receive…

And especially today…my Birthday…I am grateful…

Blessings,

Lesa