As Only Your Mama Can….                                                                                                         January 30, 2014 

Life Lesson Numbers 6:  Live Your Life So That Your Passing Is A Celebration!!

In the past ten days, I have attended the memorials of two very Godly women.  One, I was intimately friends and shared the deepest parts of my soul with, and one with whom I wish I had done so.

Both had a common bond….which I pray will be true of me when I leave this life….and, I pray for you as well….

They were Godly women who loved God and others more than this life…and it was demonstrated in how they made use of their days….

Helen Teresa Jacoby McFadden was God's gift to our family since you were two years old.  She loved us right where we were….little children climbing gates to get to her pool, screaming loudly as we played in our back yard, sharing "Tom Turkey" visits with you as you looked in awe.  We cooked meals for the month, took walks together and prayed and cried and celebrated.  I have held her tiny hands in prayer and watched her as she held yours to do the same.

I can count three people in my life with whom I have shared my truths ….the good and the ugly….and, Helen is one of those three.  There is something other-worldly…sacred… when you have that kind of a friendship with another….it's what God intended when he gave us one another as life-mates….

Helen was my sister….my sacred friend who taught me all she knew about our Heavenly Father….

And, fortunately for me….that was a substantial gift for she knew Him well on this earth, and now knows Him intimately in Heaven.

Don't be fooled….Helen's life was not a confection of perfection.  She had her struggles, her sorrows, her heartaches.  She had things with which she struggled and worked through and battled to overcome.  I know this because she shared her life with me.

But, taught me this….yes, she did….

Life is to be celebrated!

Not simply in the way one would celebrate a birthday….or anniversary…or birth….

But, in the way one would celebrate the GIFT of each day of life…of living!

I can remember her encouraging me to look for the preciousness of each day…to find nuggets of joy…to be positive and expectant that with God all things are possible and all things are made beautiful…

She told me to find good in each person and peace in each experience. 

To not rely on my own understanding of things, but to give my all over to God who knew all things.

She taught me that daughters are sacred treasures and husbands are eternal gifts that you grow to understand and appreciate as time is added to your life.

She encouraged me to dream big dreams…and, to give my dreaming to our Heavenly Maker….and, to wait with great expectation.

It was while with Helen at a Focus on the Family Women's Conference that I heard that quote from Eva Self on which I raised you and your brothers…

"Mama told me…Eva…honey….you gotta dream big dreams, I mean really, really big dreams for Eva…if Jesus lives in your dreams…your dreams will live."

Helen and I loved that quote…..we spoke often about how just like we love to hear the dreams of our children, God loves to hear our dreams….

And, how, when you place God in the center of your dreams…Your Dreams Will Live!!

Helen lived out many of her dreams for her life…..and, we were witness to that while living next door to her and even after we moved, we were witness to that as she shared with us….

So much so, that when she called me to 1016 Balsam Drive to give me the news of her illness..and, then later again to her hospital bed, her words to me were not ones of sorrow and sadness for a life cut short…too short.

Her words to me were, "I had a great life….a wonderful time….and, I am ready to go"!!

Helen gave me…and you….and her family the greatest gift a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend could give those who love her…

She lived a full life….

She was God's girl…

When her time came to pass from this world to that new home with God…

She was ready!

So that, instead of mourning like those who have no hope…

We are able to CELEBRATE her life with the full expectation of joining her some day!!!

What a day of rejoicing that will be!!!

Fast forward about ten days…

And, I find myself once again sitting at a memorial of another such Godly woman…God's girl….

I didn't personally know Ms. Rose Marie Cox Davis.......but, then again, yes I did.

I have known her through her son, Ken, these past thirty-four years or so…

As I sat at her memorial, in a room filled to overflowing with family and friends, I could not help but smile….

It was said that she not only walked beside great dignitaries in the State of Kentucky as she served our Commonwealth,  but that she also walked among we common friends as she served us and our children as the gentle "cookie lady" and to her….we were all simply "family".

Doesn't that just give you a clear image of what a Godly heart she had for HIS children?

The minister, Dr. Fugate said that she was a selfless woman…a giver if you will.  She gave from the deepest part of her heart and in that giving, found her greatest joy.  In fact, he said that she was such a kind and gentle giver that when the time came for the recipients of her giving to take care of her as she battled cancer, she found it amazing and humbling to be on the receiving end of such love and support….

Dr. Fugate said that watching those who Ms. Davis had blessed by her sharing take their turn in returning that blessing back to her was a thing of humble beauty….and, watching her learn to be a receiver was truly a gift…..

Clearly, Ms. Davis…or "Blossom" as Ken and I called her, was a Godly woman who, too, loved God and His children more than herself.

And, like Mrs. Helen….it was clear from what was shared about her life and what I know through her son, Ken, that she, too…..

Celebrated her days!

As I left Helen's memorial which started out in a winter white-out but ended in a beautiful sunset….and, yesterday, as I left "Blossom's" memorial in the rays of sunshine which ended in a lovely sunset….

I was grateful…

To bear witness to the lives of two women who's passing, while leaving rays of sorrow at their absence…

More so left beams of joy at their living…

And, they didn't just live any little life….

They lived a life for which being a part of its celebration was a beautiful and wonderful and joyful

Gift….

So, dear daughter…..learn from Mrs. Helen and Ms. "Blossom"…..

That is their gift to you….to me

The example of living a life so that our passing is a day of CELEBRATION!!

Blessings,

Mama