Love Extravagantly…..The Greatest Gift of All

 

 As I sat in our family room watching the kids open their Christmas presents, I was reminded of Ian’s young-man’s promise to me years ago and then again five years ago this May, to love me, his children, and my children extravagantly.

No, not in that way of lots of money, too many gifts to handle, spoiled-rotten kind of extravagance….although at times, I think he does that, too.  

The type of extravagance he loves us with is that soul-sharing, deep-seated love which means that no matter what, he is going to stand in front of, beside, and behind us.  When we need something, he will work hard to provide.  When we don’t need and just want, he is going to firmly and yet tenderly decline our want because he knows real love gently declines that which draws us to selfishness and away from God.  He does not claim perfection in his life, and in fact, shares his imperfections in truth.  But, what he does do acknowledge that the same heavenly Father who forgives...does this out of his great love for each of us.

And, I think that is what I love most about Ian.

He steps aside so that our children and I see God.

As a daughter of an earthy father (and mother) who did that as well, I fully understand having my earthly father step aside in worldly life so that his children could see…and recognize….and witness true love……

Authentic love

Extravagant love….as in lavish, bountiful, fulsome, and plentiful…..

And, by doing so, he is teaching my children how to do that….how to return love to others.  

When someone loves you unconditionally and you know it…it frees you

It unburdens your heart, your soul, your heart to love others in ways you might not have found possible had you not been so loved yourself.

That is what Ian does for me.  For my children.

He wraps us up in his unfailing love….credits the Father….and encourages that love to be shared with others.

You can see it in our eyes…our smiles…..our way of loving, caring, and sharing with one another….like what I bore witness to last night.

 

Sister….and brother….and brother…..and Jeremy…..and Mom…..and Ladder……laughing, sharing, and caring.

So, on this Christmas Eve, as I am reminded of my many blessings, I share my greatest….

To be loved extravagantly

For my children to be loved extravagantly

And, to witness their taking their cups which are overflowing with love and care and kindness and sharing that with those around them…

It’s a legacy Ian has given me, his, and my children….

And, I am grateful.

Be Blessed,

Lesa

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.  I John 3:1

I Corinthians 13….all of it

It's not hard.  It's basic.

It's not complicated.  It's simple.

It's not impossible.  It's required.

It's not lost.  It's forgotten.

It's not unheard of.  It's unpracticed.

And, when it is….practiced and remembered, required…..it's so simple, really.  So basic.

I texted my sweet friend, artist, wife, mommy and architect of dreams, Katie a year or so ago and asked her to paint, in her fabulous way that she has, my favorite Bible verse.  When I make such requests of Katie, I rarely give much direction. 

I don't have to. 

She knows my heart.  And, she takes what she knows to be true of me and blends it with what is true of her….

And, she creates a masterpiece.

So, when I asked Katie if she could paint a portion of my favorite…no, my beloved….Bible verse,

I Corinthians 13 on canvas, she asked me to send some "concept" pictures.  So, I did…..and then, I let go and let her take her where our hearts would lead her….

And, this is the bounty, the treasure, the blessing she gave me in return…

 

This blog post picture does not do it justice…

so, if you ever want to see it in person, please feel free to come join me….in the little corner of my bedroom, nestled up against my "Mama chair" and "prayer warrior wall"…..the little corner of my world where God and I meet as often as possible.

This treasure, on its own, is not only a work of art…..it's a work of Heart, and for that alone…I am ever grateful.

But, those of you who know Katie, know that she does not just "do" her God given gift.  She breathes it, she kneads it, she draws it, she paints it…..she lives it.

So, draw close with me friends, and I'll share a particularly tenderly sweet treasure she hid in this gift to me….

 

If you will put your hand in mine and follow with me, I will share a secret…..a lovely, beautiful, precious moment….

Start with the biggest rose on the left…my own handwriting of I Corinthians makes up the delicate petal of the rose…then move to the lower right…that is Kenton, then more right….Johnson…then up to Madison's tidy, neat, penwomanship of I Corinthians 13.  And, perhaps even more sweet is that of my husband who penned one of his favorite verses for me…

Therefore, my brethren dearly beloved and longed for, my joy and crown,

so stand fast in the Lord, my dearly beloved.

² I beseech Euodias, and beseech Syntyche, that they be of the same mind in the Lord.

³ And I entreat thee also, true yokefellow, help those women which laboured with me in the gospel,

with Clement also, and with other my fellow labourers, whose names are in the book of life.

⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice.

⁵ Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.

⁶ Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication

with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

⁷ And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

⁸ Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report;

 if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

What kind of person thinks to put into her art the handwritings of my family?  I think about that…often.  As I sit with my Mama's china cup of tea and Bible in lap sitting in my "mama" chair…..

What heart thinks to do that?  Whose hands work so carefully on the intricate patterning of every word-petal growing it into blooms of love and Him?

And, that alone make my heart swell to overflowing…and, just when I think I am too touched at heart to breathe…I notice the smallest bud of a rose…that little one which is not unfurled…but, which lays tenderestly next to mine…and, I see clearly….

My handwriting….

His words

Katie's gift to me…one Mama to another

A Mama who understands that when you lose a child on this earth, he…lives in your Mama's heart forever.

I think perhaps, although this bud is the smallest, she put into it her gentlest of love, care, and artistic gift…..

Joseph

And, Katie…..she knew that in our call to be patient and kind, to bear all things….believe all things….hope all things, that we are also called to endure…..

And, that we do this not alone

He carries us… as a knowing Father who, too, gave a son

And, even in the so-doing believed….

"Love never ends"…..

Blessings,

Lesa

In honor of the triumph of Jonah and Joseph, and Jesus!

I Am More Determined Than Ever…..

Age. 

Wisdom. 

Ignorance. 

Compassion. 

Naiveté’. 

Insight. 

Holiness. 

I don’t know what it is that compels me toward determinism (is that even a word?), but each day I walk closer to receiving my LPCA and then my LPCC, I grow more grounded and determined.

And, not that determined as in I am going to potty train my 2 year old before she hits 3, or I am going to pay my cell phone bill on time.  Not that determined which comes from the need to get to the grocery store before the baby wakes up so he will have milk.  Not even that comes from I am going to walk the dog before he goes on the carpet.

The determination I am feeling is that which comes from forcing a child out of your womb freeing it before its heartrate drops one more time.  The determination that a new Air-mom feels the first day her son flights out to BMT that she will pray him through the next 8.5 weeks. 

This determination is the kind I have had when I packed my children’s clothes and moved them from their family home for their personal safety and mental health.  The kind that made me get into the shower each morning even though I had to unstrap a catheter from my leg to do so.

You know…that kind of determination which empowers a Viet Nam veteran to last one more day and one more day until he finally makes it back to 661 Cherrywood drive.  Or, that determination which causes a mother to go and stay with her college age son until he finishes that last final requirement.  

D.E.T.E.R.M.I.N.A.T.I.O.N.

A fixed intention or resolution

And, it is right, this determination I feel

Here is what I have learned about determination

Determination speaks quietly

And consistently

And faithfully

I know this not because I myself am determined, although I hope I am growing that direction, but because I am its witness in the lives of others…

Every day, when I step into “group” with those who are struggling with their personal weaknesses, I don’t see the drug, the substance, the alcohol, the needles, the pills, the urine cups….

I see determination

Yes, sometimes it is barely visible

And, other times, it is in huge allowance

But, most times, that determination sits lightly in the chair and rests itself quietly as we walk through and talk through and cry through how to get the next supply

Of 

Determination

And, this is what I am learning….

ALL of us….All of us….Every one of us…

You

Me

We

Will at some point in our lives lay down our determination at the foot of fear, sorrow, anxiety, sin, grief, pain, anger, stupidity, intolerance, victimization, illness……

We will.....

We will lay it down right on that floor

And, we will lay right down there in a puddle beside our best laid plans, dreams, goals and wishes…

For the lack of it

And, unless you kneel down there beside me…

Unless you stop to give a girl a hand

I may not get back up and stand

With my determination

I may not

You may not…unless I stop to return the favor

And, I wonder, instead of seeing people as problems, social issues, and things to be reckoned with…

Instead, we saw brothers and sisters who gave up?

Who in a world of determined people, lost their….

Determination

Their will

Their ability to battle through whatever it is that challenges them

Because, friends, that is what I am seeing….

The more I counsel, the more I see His people as He sees them…

Beloved

Cherished

Worthy

And loved

People, who have lost their way, just like I have at times

Individuals who have made poor decisions, just like you have at times

Souls who need help finding their way back on the path….which all of us have in one way or another, for some reason or other….

Lost

So, I am determined

That when others are in short supply, I will share

And, when I am in short supply, I will seek

Not that kind of determination I used to walk through the rain to my car with groceries in my hand, nor that kind which required I get up at night to change the sheets for the second time from the illness of a sick child…..

I pray to seek that kind of determination which stays calm in a sea of storms of those I counsel…that will refrain from enabling as equally as it will refrain from judging what I do not know…..

I pray for determination that will last, survive, and even thrive….

And, to share with others, and with faith that in the sharing my own will be multiplied....

Blessings,

Lesa

When You Pray for God to Change You, Be Prepared….

            How God Made and is making me His girl…..

How many times in our lives have we been told, “watch what you pray for?”……For me, I have heard that at least one hundred times and yet, it was not until 471 days ago, today, that I have ever so profoundly understood.

When you pray, God will respond

And, while I don’t fully understand whether or not God “causes” things to happen to us or whether He just “uses” the things that happen to us for His Glory…..or, maybe a little of both….

What I do know for certain, without a doubt, with a mature clarity which comes when you pray seeking something that....

He is at the end of the answer

For years, I had prayed, “Lord, make me “your girl”.

And yet, despite my young girl’s, young adult’s and well into woman’s prayers, I did not “get it”.  I don’t know if that is because I was headstrong, arrogant, ignorant, or just without a soft heart….I don’t know if it was pride, or selfish ambition, or laziness….

Whatever the cause, I never seemed to “get to the bottom of myself and to the beginning of God”…..

It was not because I have not been knocked off my feet, for anyone who knows my life history (no different than yours) knows that I have had my brokenness…..things in my youth, things in my college days, things in my young girl life….things in my marriage, motherhood, and family relationships…

Pick one…any one of them were opportunities to draw closer to God (and, I did to some degree), to fall on my knees in prayer (and, I did to some degree), to give over my heart to God (and, I did to some degree)…..

But, it was all “to some degree”

I don’t know what made my experience 471 days ago different from any other season in my life….why now, more than ever, I understand what it means to be His

Not just when things are good, not just when life is smooth, not only when I pray and He answers in the affirmative I am seeking…

But, in all times, in all seasons, during all situations which my life has the opportunity to face….

Maybe it was in the knowing that no one on this earth had the power to make me well, except God

No one truly understood my suffering, more than God

No one was there with me as I lay night after night, day after day, wondering if I would make it to the morning, except God

No one could take my pain, my fear that I would never see normal again, other than God

No one could wipe away the tears which fell during my season of quiet desperation as I asked Him to heal me, except the One who had created me

And, it was in this understanding that I was totally at His mercy that I came to understand His grace, His compassion, and His Love…

I am starting to understand that while physically, I will never be “good as new”….. in spirit, in heart, in all things which matter, I have never been more well

While I walked that journey with a broken body, I did not walk without joy

Without faith

Without understanding and belief that, “never will I leave you, never will I forsake you”

God does not promise us a certain goodness, wellness, pureness in this life

What He promises us is that no matter what comes our way, He will never leave us

I don’t think I totally understood that, I don’t think I would have ever understood that, I don’t think I had the capacity to fully recognize that truth

Until I walked with Him in the past 471 days….

But, I do understand that now…..

As He grows me into His Girl

As He answers my young girl’s prayer to be His Girl

As He shows me that as I become more and more His Girl, He is ever and always,

My Guy

He Truly was then, is now, and will forever be…the answer to

My Prayer,

The Prayer……

The Prayer

I pray you'll be our eyes
And watch us where we go
And help us to be wise
In times when we don't know

Let this be our prayer
When we lose our way

Lead us to a place
Guide us with your Grace
To a place where we'll be safe

I pray we'll find your light
And hold it in our hearts
When stars go out each night
Let this be our prayer
When shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace

Give us faith so we'll be safe.

We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love

Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer
Just like every child
Just like every child

Needs to find a place,
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe

Blessings,

Lesa