………..As Only Your Mama Can

O is for Ocean, Only and One

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Ocean

You are the daughter of a mother who loves the ocean.  I am the mother of a daughter who loves the ocean.  I am not sure why we so love the ocean, but we do and we have and I cannot remember a single time in my life when I did not.  I cannot remember a single time in your life when you did not.

 

I feel closest to God at the ocean….there is a mindfulness which comes to me when I am there. 

I feel the presence of the Lord most intimately and most powerfully….at the ocean.

Prayers come simpler, laughter comes sweeter, and memories are made deeper at the ocean…

It is a great gift God gives us when He gives us the ocean….and, I am grateful.

Only

You are my only daughter.  When your dad and I were in pre-marriage counseling, we discussed how many children we wanted to have and we both said simultaneously, “four”.  One daughter, twin sons and a child of which we don’t know the sex.

We had our daughter, Madison.  We had twin sons, Kenton and Johnson, and we had our precious baby which we miscarried and truly do not know the sex of, but have always called him Joseph.

I no longer wonder at the way God works…..

I just stand in awe….

In the process of having our children, God found it fit to give me a “one and only” daughter.  There comes a lot of responsibility with being the oldest…and being the oldest daughter.

There are responsibilities you carry in your life as our oldest which neither of your brothers will ever understand.  Pressures, stresses, challenges which only first borns can know.

I see that baby.

Embrace your “only” status…..accept it, embrace it, and be glad for it…..see the positives which come from being the first and the only daughter….

Ask God to grow in you a fortitude and insight and direction so that your life is one which upon looking back upon it, you can be proud.

This life is about giving God the glory in our lives…taking the good in us and reflecting it back to this world….taking the bad in us and using it for His good and reflecting it back to this world…

Embrace your only daughter status….accept it…..

Use it…..

Every single day for the rest of your life…….

Jesus was an only....he understands

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.  John 3:16 

One

There are many “ones” in your life…but, these are truly the only “ones” which really matter….

God

Jesus

Holy Spirit

His Written Word

When you understand this and immerse your daily life into living this truth, then your life’s purpose and meaning will become more real and more clear and more live-able to you.

It is really as simple as that!  

Blessings on your week…..

ILYAOYMC,

Mama

 

 

 

 

 

 

Five Minute Friday - JUMP

Into the strong arms of my Papaw Perry when he would come for a visit

Onto the lap of my Pappy Millstead even with my flip flops on

Off of the chair and onto the floor of my Granny Lettie’s  Kitchen

All around Grandmother Frances’ living room as we danced to her favorite tunes on the record player

 

From the top of the fence into my Daddy’s waiting arms, knowing he would not drop me

Off of the very high diving board at the pool while Mama said to be the little engine who could 

Into the creek at Doe Valley with my sweet and best friend Beth while listening to Barry Manilow

Out of a tree and onto the ground with my friends Susie and Valda at a church potluck

Into my first puppy love with Frank at the insistence of my good friend, Janet 

Into a life at EKU which brought about lessons on friendships, life and love and education

Into a season of employment which would introduce me to Suzanne and Dianne, my sister-friends 

Onto a frame of home and life and family which would create three houses and many memories

Into the greatest earthly gifts in my life through the births of my children..M, J,  K and J

Into the arms and heart of a man who has loved me since I was thirteen and for whom I am grateful 

Into the greatest season of my life where God is my foundation,

                                                                     love is my commitment

                                                                 and Grace is my wings

I

 Jump……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Birthday Challenge….

 Laying down the gauntlet   and.....calling up the warrior…. 

You are 23 years old tomorrow.  If God so blesses, and you are fortunate, you may live another 77 to become 100!  How wonderful that would be?

I have not been the example you deserve these past twenty-three years.  Not in being a woman, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend….and, especially a “self”.  But, I am working in that direction….and, I pray you see my efforts. 

Because, as God as my HOLY WITNESS and SOLE READER OF MY HEART, there is nothing I want more than to be....

Godly

Believing

Loving

Kind

Compassionate

Worthy

Humble

Honest

Authentic 

You deserve that from me.  You are worth that from me.  

You do.

You are. 

‘lest this fall into a sob story of all my wrongs, I want to move you into thought…

Who is Madison?

For WHOM does Madison live?

To Who is Madison committed? 

What are your one year, five year, ten year goals and are you on track to set them into being? 

Life is about being disciplined in your walk on this earth.

I have not taught that to you very well….I do not live it very well…it is a struggle in my life. 

I am not alone in this struggle….

I fear strict discipline because my experience with it is that those around me who are disciplined are not very kind, loving and compassionate (and, at times, not even Godly) and I could not find a way to merge the two… 

BUT, God can merge the two….and, He will, if you ask. 

 

I’m asking….on your behalf. 

That is all I can do… 

The rest is up to you. 

So, I leave you with these thoughts… 

Are you willing to love yourself in the way that our Father loves you?

Before you say yes…Are you really willing to love yourself as God loves you?

Because if you are…then, you will love yourself and grow yourself into the best you…that you can become.  You will give over your whole heart, soul, mind, body and life….to Him.You and I have walked 10,000 miles together as mother and daughter….there have been hills and there have been valleys.  We have talked long and hard and we have walked silently side by side.  We have on occasion…gasp….yelled….and we have shed tears.  We have laughed and we have made memories.  Never once in all our time together did I ever doubt your love for me…

Never…

And, I hope….I expect that you can say the same about me….

So, because I love you, I am laying down the gauntlet and calling up your Warrior!!!

Let’s commit…to just a few things together…

From April 10, 2013 until May 10, 2013

Together….just you and I…..

LETS Commit to….

* Read a passage from the Bible every day (Klove, Heartlight or just get out your Bible) (I personally am going to read Philippians, Psalms and I Corinthians and in that order)

* Walk at least 15 minutes every day on “purpose”….intentionality is a requirement in our chosen professions.  Let’s start with intentionally walking.  NO excuses!! You live on a campus for peats sake!!

* Drink water or tea or non-sweet drinks only.  Cold turkey no sweet drinks!

* Journal every day even if all you write is “I don’t know what to journal” or, I am going to reinstate my “Gratefulness journal” I have on my bed.  You can do that with yours.  One word per day…

* Eliminate negativity (No talking about “you know who” or anyone else who causes hurt or pain in our lives)

* Pray before our feet hit the ground in the morning and after our feet go under the covers at night

It takes 21 days to change or generate a new habit…let’s start on ours today!!

Ready    Set      Go!!!

Let’s meet back here on May 10, 2013 to see how we have done…

    Let’s meet back here on May 10, 2013 to see What Great Things HE has done!

I believe we can do anything together….

And, that all things are possible “through Christ who strengthens me”…..

Laying down the gauntlet….calling up the WARRIOR….

ILYAOYMC,

Mama

 

 

Five Minute Friday:  After

I didn’t realize….

The gifts my parents truly gave me…

The joy of journaling on a pond behind my childhood home…

The sweetness of splashing feet into a cold stream with my best friend, Beth…

The kindness of a Grandmother who listened…

The tenderness of a young man’s love…

The joyfulness of motherhood….

The sorrow losing a child cannot hold…

The brokenness a failed marriage brings…

The healing our Father is able to provide…

The meaning of a covenant with God…

Until After…..

I grew a faith which was their gift to me….

I found my journals all boxed and ready to share with my daughter

I had to walk through life without her by my side

I heard her sweet words running through my head

I found his love again as an adult…

 I spent twenty-three years becoming their mother…

I understood that there are some Gifts from God which last only moments

I accepted that there is some brokenness only God can heal…

I saw that our Faithful Father heals all things….in His time…not ours…

I believed and understood that we live this live…our marriages…our parenting in faithful covenant with a God who is the KEEPER of COVENANTS…

 

LSMY

 

If it’s Monday, It’s Mama (plus four days and a need for a name change)

N Is for Navigating’, Nurture, and Nickname

You have heard me say many times over your soon-to-be twenty three years that “life is a journey.”  It is our daily walk and while it may seem like it can last a long time, when you get to my age, you realize it is over in a wink and a blink and a nod.

As with any journey, it has its high points and its low points, many of which are determined by the company we keep and the places we choose to go.  And for the most part, it is our choices which determine our path.

Choose wisely.

Choose with discernment.

Choose with a heart for where you want to end up at the end of your life. 

When I was your age, I kept a journal and on one page, very early on, I wrote down goals for my life, most of which I have now accomplished.. 

Simple goals

Not lengthy, but rather…brief 

But, focused. 

Ten of them….listed in just a few, simple words 

And, at the very top is…. 

Live for Christ 

I wrote this in 1980….I was 18 years old 

I may have been young, but I knew whose path on which I wanted to walk, and it was not mine. 

What I did not know at 18 was that choosing to live for Christ was the easy decision.  What is much harder is “navigating” this life in a Godly fashion every day, every way….all the time. 

Navigating, by definition, means to find a way through a place… 

And, that is what life is truly about….”finding a way through this life…this world…this time….as we seek to get to THAT place called heaven… 

I wish I could tell you it would always be easy, but you know from your short 23 years that it is not easy….

So, I ask myself…what about navigating this journey have I learned that I would like to share with my precious daughter?   

Here are a few lessons I have learned, some from my own learning, some from that of others….I hope it helps… 

Ask God to send you and to stay with you every step of your journey

Begin with the end in mind….if heaven is your goal, walk heaven’s direction

Become faithfully fit..it requires time with God…in His Word

Be physically and emotionally fit…it requires time and effort

Know your limitations and give all to God

Be committed…disciplined

 

Choose your attitude up front

 

Your attitude toward your journey will determine how you navigate your life…..and, it will make all the difference.  You are going to have times of great joy and gladness…and, you are going to have times of great sorrow and brokenness. 

You navigate your emotional life just as you do your physical life….by choice. 

I don’t know how to say this enough….because I think you struggle with it at times.. 

Chose to navigate your life with a positive frame of reference.

Lay down on the path those past matters which will hold back joy in your life…and  

Walk forward….

 

N is for Nurture 

Nurture is to give tender care and protection….I think you do a good job of nurturing others.  I see it with your friendships and with your co-workers and even your family members.

 You have a nurturing heart…a kind heart…a sweet heart. 

You have always had a nurturing heart even when you were a little girl.  Although you most definitely were a tumbly little girl…tomboy-ish even at times, you always took time to be kind, gentle and to take care of those around you.

What I have not seen as much of is nurturing yourself and that is my prayer for these next few years in your life…that you see your value and worth and give yourself permission to take care of yourself.

It is okay. 

It IS Godly to take care of yourself.  He expects is of us.

Taking care of one’s self does not equate to selfishness….it equates to Godliness. 

Even Jesus took care of himself….to rest, to pray, to breathe and seek His Father’s direction.

So, baby….nurture yourself….

I don’t know what all that would entail…I have a few thoughts on the matter but I won’t say them here because I know it drives you crazy when I do….:) 

But, you know… 

You are headed into a profession so pulling on your wellness that they require you to take a class on “self-wellness”…they understand and are trying to prepare you for the trials which will come your way as a social worker. 

How can you help others….if you do not help and nurture yourself. 

Love yourself….nurture yourself….eliminate those things which hinder you from doing so… 

You are worth your very best effort to nurture yourself… 

N is for Nicknames…

Sweetpea

Maddie Beth

Maddie Poo

MEJ

Snickelbritches

Sweetie

Princess

Puss (from Grammy, a tradition and intended for good)

Sweetie Girl (from Mamaw)

Jewelsy

Speed deamon

Baby 

And, the list could go on and on… 

I love nicknames which families and friends have for one another… 

Nicknames are an indication that there is an intimate relationship between the nickname giver and the nickname receiver…they often tell a story….remind us of precious moments or even of silly and fun times together…

And, we have had many…..wonderful, blessed, precious times together. 

I cherish each and every one… 

And, I find myself at times…laughing out loud remembering something silly or funny or sweet

It brings joy to my heart and laughter to my soul 

And, gratefulness to my heart… 

That of all the mothers in all of the world living at all of the times….God would chose me to have you… 

My daughter

Friend

Companion

Warrior

Confidant

Co-writer

Silliness provider 

And, I am confident that over the years, you will earn even more nicknames….from friends, from family and one day, maybe even a husbandJ 

In the interim….enjoy those you have now… 

They are good nicknames…they are sweet 

And, they should make you smile…for that is what nicknames are for… 

ILYAOYMC,

Mama